For me, sex is all about quality. I'd rather have good sex once every two weeks than have routine sex three times a week. Good-quality sex to me means my man gives his all during foreplay. And, of course, I also do my part. I am talking about a lot of kissing, throwing in a massage wouldn't be bad, but it isn't necessary.
Then, of course, there should be some cunnilingus – I'll return the favour.
Then we go into good lovemaking – with a variation in the tempo. And my man should tell me all those good things a woman wants to hear: how beautiful I am and all those sweet nothings. It should be nice and slow; I'm not a quickie girl.
Quantity. I'm a man and what can I say: I think about sex a lot and I need it often. I'm down for a quickie, passionate lovemaking, and good old rough sex. Just give it to me.
I want a combination of both quality and quantity. I have had sex just for the heck of it and I actually regretted it. It was meaningless. I don't want to let someone in my cookie jar just for the sake of it.
I've realised sex for a woman is not the same as it is for men.
Yes, I know, you're like 'Of course, are you just realising this now?' Yes, it took me a while to realise it, but hey – better late than never. For a man, all he needs is that release and sensation. For a woman, and me specifically, I need to feel wanted. Part of what will get me to have an orgasm is knowing the man I'm with is genuinely into me.
Then, of course, I do like to have sex regularly.
Sex, to me, is part of marriage. So I'm a bit ashamed to say this, but at this time in my life, it's about quantity.
We have two children and we literally have no time for romance between working long-hour jobs and taking care of our children. The little time we do have is for fulfilling our marital conjugal obligations. Sad, but true. I know men need sex and if they don't get it from you, they are very likely to go out and get it, so I make sure I do my man regularly – even if it's just for 10 minutes each time.
Both quality and quantity matter to me. I've been with women who were not in the mood to have sex but just did it anyway to shut me up. I didn't like it because they were just lying on the bed waiting for me to be done. That's not what sex is about – whether it is a short or long session, both partners have to participate.
I don't want to feel like I'm having sex with a log.
That being said, I don't advocate for long dry spells. Sex is important to a man, so it has to be available often.
Related: Getting Around Bad Sex
How about you? Do you want lots of sex, or good-quality sex less often? Or a little bit of both? Tell us in the comment section below or on Facebook.