Couple stroking each others bodies
(C) Love Matters | Rita Lino

First time sex: what to expect

When people talk about the ‘first time’, they usually mean the first time you have full intercourse. That’s what people mean by ‘losing your virginity’.

But the first time might also mean your first kiss or the first time you masturbate someone or someone masturbates you. Or the first time with your new boyfriend or girlfriend.

Whatever first time it is, it’s something you’ll never forget. It’s exciting and special. That’s why it’s important to make sure it’s something you’ll want to remember.

If you are a virgin or have never had sex with your partner before, it’s natural to be nervous for your first time. But, we’re here to help you out! Here are some tips to overcome those first-time worries.

Learn as much about sex as you can

Have a look at all our information on making love and our tips for first-time sex. The more you know about sex, the less worried you’ll feel!

Talk about it

There are a lot of reasons people might feel uncomfortable talking to their partner about sex. You don’t want to seem too forward. You might not want to seem knowledgeable – even though knowing stuff about sex doesn’t mean you’ve been practising, it just means you’ve done your homework!

The secret to great sex is communication. The more you dare to be open and honest with your partner about your needs and your worries, the more rewarding sex will be for both of you. Take a relaxed moment to discuss fears and concerns so you can go into the night relaxed and prepared.

Get sex education

Depending on your cultural background, you may even get some sex education sessions to prepare you for sex. Along the Kenyan coast, for example, kitchen parties or hen parties are common. Aunties and friends will pass on their knowledge to women when they are preparing to get married.

Start when you feel ready

There is only one person who can decide if you’re ready to have sex for the first time: you. Listen to your own feelings and don’t let yourself be talked into anything.

On average, people have intercourse for the first time when they’re 17 years old.

Relax

Ease the pressure off yourselves. You don’t necessarily have to have sex the first time you are intimate unless you really want to. Make sure to take time to explore and discover each other’s bodies at a comfortable pace. Building it up over days, weeks or months can make it more exciting.
You can also chat to feel relaxed. Talk about how life, food, friends – just some fun stuff.

Take your time

If you feel nervous, be honest. Chances are high your partner feels the same way.
Take it slowly. Don’t rush into anything. Take time for lots and lots of foreplay. Kiss, touch, and caress each other. Make it last. Make each other feel loved. Make sure it’s not rushed and traumatic, but sexy and memorable.

Notice your partner’s body language. Respond to their feelings and moves. If you are confused, afraid, or in pain, tell them gently. You can even ask them to stop until you get more comfortable with each other.

Listen to your feelings

Once you’ve started, you might realise that you actually don’t want to do it. Don’t ignore this feeling. You can always stop, whatever the other person says. Do things at your own pace.

Be clear. If you say ‘no’ but at the same time keep kissing and caressing, your partner won’t be able to tell what you really want.

Pay attention to your partner

You don’t have sex just for yourself – you have sex together. So pay attention to your partner.
Are they enjoying it? Ask.

Are they nervous? Try to reassure them by saying loving things.

Does your partner feel insecure about you seeing them naked? Tell them how gorgeous they are.
Can you tell your partner doesn’t want to go any further? Respect that. You can really enjoy making love without having intercourse.

Talk to each other

The first time you probably won’t know exactly what to do.
Pay attention to the way your partner responds. Do they moan? Do they guide your hand to a particular place? These are signs that you’re heading in the right direction. But often the signals aren’t so clear, so talk to each other about what you’d like to try. Many people find talking about it really arousing too.

Use a condom

Always use a condom. That way you not only prevent unwanted pregnancy but also protect against STDs (sexually transmitted diseases). Most other family planning methods only stop the woman from getting pregnant.

Accidents with condoms are nearly always the result of using them wrongly. So read the instructions carefully and use one to practice. Boys can practise on themselves, and women can practise by putting a condom on a banana.

You can read more about using condoms in the section on birth control.

Don’t pretend to have an orgasm

There’s no rule that says you have to have an orgasm. Don’t pretend to have one: it’s not fair to your partner. Anyway, making love without having an orgasm can be wonderful too.

It’s okay to laugh

The first time you’ll probably both be a bit nervous. You want everything to be perfect and the first time to be amazing, so you might both be a bit tense and serious. But try to keep the mood light. Humour and sex are a perfectly good mix!

Don’t take erection problems too seriously

Don’t make a big deal of erection trouble. Because of nerves and pressure to perform, men can have trouble getting an erection. Guys, go easy on yourselves, it can happen to anyone. Ladies, remember it’s not because he doesn’t think you are sexy. Take the lead, and enjoy the challenge of turning him on. But don’t take it personally if his penis doesn’t respond this time.

Blood (or no blood) is okay

Don’t make a big deal of bleeding – or not bleeding. First-time intercourse might make the woman bleed if the hymen tears. But bear in mind: if she doesn’t bleed, it doesn’t mean she is not a virgin.

Do check out our myths and FAQs about the Hymen and Virginity.

Easy does it

Be gentle. You don’t need to be rough to ‘break’ virginity. It’s possible that the woman might feel some pain the first time (though not necessarily). The way to minimise pain is for her to be as relaxed and aroused as possible, so her vagina is really wet and doesn’t tense up. The vaginal tissue is very tender and can be easily damaged, which can be very painful for the woman.

So comfort her and love her with all your heart. And take plenty of time for foreplay to drive her wild with desire before you move on to intercourse.

Our tips will get you started, but you may still have some questions about having sex for the first time. Keep on reading to get answers to all your queries.

First-time sex FAQ

Does the first time always hurt?
No. If a woman is relaxed and sexually aroused, it doesn’t hurt. If you’re very tense, the vagina can stay dry or may tighten up. This increases the chance of the hymen tearing and intercourse being painful. The first time you’re often excited or nervous, so this can easily happen. But if you both take your time, it doesn’t hurt.

Ways of making love: do you lose your virginity?

  • Masturbating: no
  • Kissing, stroking, feeling, caressing: no
  • Oral sex (stimulating the penis or vulva with your mouth): opinions vary depending on culture and tradition, or from one person to another
  • Anal intercourse (penis in the anus): opinions vary depending on culture and tradition, or from one person to another
  • Vaginal intercourse (penis in the vagina): yes

Do all women bleed when they first have sex?

No. Research has shown that a lot of women don’t bleed the first time. For one thing, your hymen might have been stretched by using tampons or doing sport like horse riding. You might have a very thin or stretchy hymen or have been born without a hymen.

Whether you bleed or not says nothing about whether or not you’re a virgin.

You are less likely to bleed if you take your time making love, you’re relaxed and your vagina is moist, and your partner goes gently. On the other hand, if your hymen is thick and not very stretchy, you might also bleed the second or third time you have sex. That doesn’t make you a super-virgin!

In some families, it’s the custom for a woman to show a sheet with bloodstains after her wedding night. This is supposed to be proof that she was a virgin. The family may think that if she can’t show any blood, she must have had intercourse with a man before. But that’s a misconception.

How can I make sure I bleed the first time?

Some women particularly want to bleed on their wedding night. They might want to convince their new husband they’re still a virgin, when in fact they aren’t. Or they might still be a virgin but are worried their husband will have doubts about their virginity if they don’t bleed.

For all these reasons, women look for ways to make sure they bleed on their wedding night. There are lots of tricks, ranging from pricking or cutting your finger and dripping some blood on the sheet, to using an ‘artificial hymen’. Some women also opt to have an operation to have their hymen ‘restored’.
If you use one of these tricks, remember you’re helping to keep the myth alive that women always bleed the first time they have sex!

Tell us what you think

Recent Comments (232)

  1. First time make feel no more
    First time make feel no more

    1. (No subject)
      Hi Eunice,

      What did the first make you feel no more?

    2. WHT DOES DAT STATEMENT MEAN.
      WHT DOES DAT STATEMENT MEAN.

      1. Hey Didi, which statement?

        Hey Didi, which statement?

      1. Hi Palmer, we are glad to be…

        Hi Palmer, we are glad to be of help.

    3. Yes I meant alot today. Im…
      Yes I meant alot today. Im always curious about bleeding for the first time or not but reading this gives me more understanding.

    4. Great advice on love matters
      Great advice on love matters

      1. Hello Stephen, thank you for…

        Hello Stephen, thank you for your positive feedback. 

      1. Hello Brayo, thank you for…

        Hello Brayo, thank you for getting in touch. Could you please specify what it is you want to know?

         

        1. Jingo, keep reading our…

          Jingo, keep reading our articles. 

    1. If you have been force to…
      If you have been force to have sex in childhood do you still have your hymen

      1. Hi Phylix, 

        Likely not. If…

        Hi Phylix, 

        Likely not. If it was penetrative sex, then chances are that the hymen was torn. If it was outercouse, chances are that the hymen is still intact. Read about outercourse here: Outercourse: Sex Without Penetration

        Also, you talk about being forced to have sex in childhood. That is child molestation and it should be reported if possible and if the victim wishes to. Also, if you or someone you know has gone through this, it is important to seek counselling services to talk to a counsellot about what happened. These professionals can help in healing. 

    1. Thank you for your feedback…
      Thank you for your feedback Evah.

      1. Hello Pascal, thank you for…

        Hello Pascal, thank you for getting in touch, how can we help you? 🙂

  2. Infact my first time i din’t…
    Infact my first time i din’t bleed

    1. This is normal Shantel, not…
      This is normal Shantel, not all girls will bleed the first time they have sex.

      1. i still dnt knw am still a…
        i still dnt knw am still a vargin my dear

        1. Hey, what don’t you know now…
          Hey, what don’t you know now that you are a virgin?

    2. Also dint bleed my first tyme
      Also dint bleed my first tyme

      1. Hey Nish, this is normal as…

        Hey Nish, this is normal as you have seen in the article above. 

  3. Thx i wanna fuck like ts…
    Thx i wanna fuck like ts destiny

    1. Thank you for sharing Kaylor.
      Thank you for sharing Kaylor.

  4. Thanks I have learned alot
    Thanks I have learned alot

    1. We appreciate the feedback…
      We appreciate the feedback Reboh.

  5. First time was the hardest…
    First time was the hardest moment.I used to hear people talk of pleasure but I cursed that night.nervousness, pain and bleeding took over

    1. So sorry about this Carol…
      So sorry about this Carol. The first time can be challenging. We hope things are better now.

    2. Hi….Did u take anything…
      Hi….Did u take anything after your first sex to prevent pregnancy

      1. Hey, good question. It is…

        Hey, good question. It is always important to use protection when one doesn’t want to get pregnant and to reduce the risk of getting a Sexually Transmitted infection (STI). Condoms, when used correctly and all time can help prevent both unplanned pregnancies and STIs. Have a look at the following articles for more information;- 

        https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom

        https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/female-condom

        1. how to control uses of condom
          how to control uses of condom

          1. Hello Bolale, your question…

            Hello Bolale, your question is not clear do rephrase so we can support you. 

  6. Am in a long distance…
    Am in a long distance relationship,av now dated for 2years,i actually love my boyfriend and i know he does too,still virgin n its not that he doesnt want to make love,he demands but i deny him n he will still love me n respect my decision…the other day as we were having chats with him via phone,he told me that next time am going to visit him,we gonna make love,now am confused coz its the first time plus am gonna join collage soon,will making lov with him for the first time affect my studies?please help coz i dont want to hurt him

    1. Hi Claudia, You don’t have…
      Hi Claudia, You don’t have to have sex since your partner is demanding for it if you are not ready for it. Having sex can affect you emotionally and even physically especially if you are not ready and this is not what you want. If you choose to have sex do remember to prevent unplanned pregnancy and Sexually Transmission Infections (STIs). Check out this article;- https://lovematters.co.ke/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-what-to-expect

        1. Thank you for the feedback.
          Thank you for the feedback.

    2. Are u really sure that he’s…
      Are u really sure that he’s the guy u want to give ur virginity, if so dont be nervous

      1. Thank you Brian for your…

        Thank you Brian for your contribution.

  7. I usually sex chat with my…
    I usually sex chat with my guy and now it’s like he wants us to have sex but am not ready azn am scared I want to have sex after marriage not .but I don’t want to tell him no because it will hurt him how do I go about it

    1. Hi Mona, Unfortunate you…
      Hi Mona, Unfortunate you have to be honest with him about how you feel especially if you are not ready to have sex. While he may not be happy about this he will respect your choice and wait until it is the right time and you are ready.

    1. You are welcome Oscar and…
      You are welcome Oscar and thank you too. Keep reading.

  8. First time is a new life,…
    First time is a new life, patience and gentleness means alot in this time, its hard to make this day real and effective but with the congress of you two bond with love then its crazy magic, never gonna loose respect for this hour, it takes life another mile but must be positive as you await the rain

  9. Hey Ras, thank you for your…

    Hey Ras, thank you for your thoughts, we appreciate.

  10. Thanks for this article. It…
    Thanks for this article. It really advises. Far from this, may I inquire to know if size of penis(though irrelevant to this topic) determine who or which kind of a woman to have! Assistance

    1. Hi Otieno, ones penis size…
      Hi Otieno, ones penis size doesn’t determine which kind of woman to have or be with. Remember, sex is only one part of a relationship. People get into relationships for various reasons including companionship, love and friendship. Think about what you want from a partner and from a relationship before deciding to get into one or even whom to get into a relation with. We wish you well. Check out this article;- https://lovematters.co.ke/love-relationships/meeting-someone/how-to-date

  11. It’s great thx alot am…
    It’s great thx alot am learned now

    1. You are welcome Charles.
      You are welcome Charles.

  12. What is the right age to…
    What is the right age to have sex for the first time?

    1. Hi there, You should have…

      Hi there, You should have sex when you feel like and only if you have sexual feelings for a person. Don’t do it because you have reached a certain age, because of peer pressure, or because it will make your partner happy. This is entirely your personal decision and you don’t have to be forced into it if you do not feel ready regardless of your age. It is however important for one to be mature enough enough to be able to deal with the consequences of having sex. Think about whether you are ready to handle the issues that come up with having sex. Remember, you can always say no if you do not feel ready. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/are-you-really-ready-to-have-sex

  13. My penis ni ndogo Sana. I am…
    My penis ni ndogo Sana. I am really embarrassed about having sex, which penis enlargement creams or drugs can I use to make it bigger. I have a gf I want to have sex with her soon please.

    1. Hi Joe, first non of the…

      Hi Joe, first non of the products that promise to enlarge penises really work or provide permanent results. The only option that is likely to work is surgery. It is important that you do talk with your partner about what their expectations are about sex. You will find that your partner appreciates quality sex and not just quantity or size, affection and even foreplay. Learn as much as possible about sex but also get to know what your partner wants or enjoys. Check out the following articles for more information;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/worried-your-penis-is-too-small

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/can-i-make-my-penis-bigger

  14. I have seen an advertisement…
    I have seen an advertisement penis enlargement cream what is the side effect of using the cream?

    1. Hello Nicho, Penis…

      Hello Nicho, Penis enlargement products including creams do not work. There is no evidence that they do work, for this reason we would not encourage you to try using them. Sex is about affection, and you may also find that your partner appreciates longer sessions of foreplay. Do talk to your partner and get to know what they like and enjoy. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/six-myths-about-increasing-penis-size

  15. feel afraid of first time…
    feel afraid of first time xex bcz I hav a very xmal penx what xhld i do

    1. Hey there, there is so much…

      Hey there, there is so much to sex, it is important that you take time to learn as much as you and at the same time talk to your partner and get to know what they like. If it is the first time for both of you, allow yourselves to learn what you both like. Don’t have very high expectations of each other or the experience, allow time for you both to get to learn each other and to also learn what you each enjoy. It will get better with time and with communication between the two of you. Check out the following articles for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-dos-and-donts

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/small-penis-its-all-in-the-mind

  16. Had xxx with my gal this…
    Had xxx with my gal this past weekend for the first time. Her v was very dry, is this normal for some gals?

    1. Hi Bryan, the vagina gets…

      Hi Bryan, the vagina gets wet when a girl is aroused. Sometimes partners may need to spend alittle more time on foreplay for this to happen. Also, what turns on or arouses one person may not not have the same effect on another, for this reason it is important for partners to talk about what turns them on. Lastly, was she prepared to have sex, did she want to have sex? If one is unwilling or unprepared to have sex, she is like not to get aroused since she doesn’t want it. Talking about sex helps to improve the experience for both partners. You can also consider using artificial lubrication like KY Jelly which can be purchased at a pharmacy. Check out the following articles for more tips;- 

       https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/foreplay-dos-and-donts

  17. Atleast I know to do to…
    Atleast I know to do to avoid that pain the first time. Thank you.

    1. Hey Joy, great. we are glad…

      Hey Joy, great. we are glad this was useful to you.

  18. Nko na dem bt nkitaka 2meet…
    Nko na dem bt nkitaka 2meet tanye mapenzi haki, hw can i do ?

    1. Go try this out Rastah.

      Go try this out Rastah.

  19. If I only had sex once and…
    If I only had sex once and never again will I bleed again when I have sex?

    1. Dear Daisy, bleeding may or…

      Dear Daisy, bleeding may or may not happen during the first time one has sex after the first time it will not happen again as a result of the hymen being stretched. Remember even when having sex for the first time, one may not bleed and this doesn’t mean they are not a virgin. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/the-hymen-what-is-it

  20. I have afiance she seems to…
    I have afiance she seems to loveme and I also love her deeply but she is afraid of meeting me even when I asure her that my aim to have her in my house isn’t sex and I dont want to lose her how can I explain for her to believe me?

    1. Hi there, is this your…

      Hi there, is this your fiance or girlfriend? Have you tried to meet her at a location that she is comfortable, one that is not your house or their house? Also, have you asked her why she doesn’t believe you when you tell her its not about sex? I am not able to tell you how to explain to her so she believes you, however, your partner doesn’t seem to be ready to have sex and it is important that you respect this choice. Also, you don’t have to meet at your house, if you do love and respect her meet where she feels comfortable which may include a public space and within time that she is comfortable for you both. We wish you well. 

  21. Wi av dated 4 tow yrz now en…
    Wi av dated 4 tow yrz now en stll now hatujawai fanya mapenzi n vizuri tukiazia hiyo ssa am tuendelee tll our night

    1. Hey Neily, if you and your…

      Hey Neily, if you and your partner are at a place where you feel ready to have sex, you can go ahead. It is however important that talk about first, including how you plan to prevent unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). You can consider using condoms which when used correctly and consistent help prevent both unplanned pregnancies and STIs. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom

      1. Am 19 and have not had sex…
        Am 19 and have not had sex b4,my guy have dated for 2 years is asking me for sex and am afraid be cause of the pain as a virgin,pls I need ur advice I don’t know wat to do

        1. HI Joy, first, the decision…

          HI Joy, first, the decision to have sex is your personal decision. Only choose to have sex if you feel ready to have it, if you feel you are with the right person and if you feel it is the right time. Sex for the first time doesn’t have to be painful, it is important that you are relaxed when having sex and that your partner takes time to prepare you or to get you aroused which will cause the vagina to self lubricate or become wet. This makes intercourse or penetration easier, reduces the discomfort and enjoyable for both partners. Also, should you choose to have sex, remember to use protection. Condoms can help prevent both unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections. Check out the following articles for additional information;- 

          https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/female-virginity-top-five-facts

          https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/how-to-make-first-time-sex-a-big-success

    1. Thank you feedback Mary, you…

      Thank you feedback Mary, you are welcome.

    1. Thank you Mary, welcome.

      Thank you Mary, welcome.

  22. My partner say I don’t…
    My partner say I don’t satisfy her what hold I do?

  23. first day I had sex I never…
    first day I had sex I never fell pain it went well

    1. Thank you for sharing your…

      Thank you for sharing your experience Chika.

  24. The pussy of my galfriend…
    The pussy of my galfriend has a bad smell is this okay or she has an infection?

    1. Hi Ben, Vaginal odour, or…

      Hi Ben, Vaginal odour, or smell, is normal. Every vagina has its own, individual scent, and one shouldn’t try to change or disguise it. When there is a drastic change in the odour, it may indicate the presence of an infection, this is something only your partner maybe to tell unless you have been with them long enough to tell that there has been a drastic change. Check out the following article for more information;-

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/female-body/vaginal-discharge-and-odour-top-facts

  25. How many shots are OK to…
    How many shots are OK to have or to satisfied?

  26. When I sex chat with my…
    When I sex chat with my girlfriend she talks of things she refuses to go through with when we now physically she says they are just fantasize but she would never go through with them. Why?

    1. Hi Kedi, it is important…

      Hi Kedi, it is important that you respect your partner’s choice if she chooses to go through with anything during sex. Phone sex is a great way to fantasize things that you may not be able to do or those things that you may even be scared to do. It may start with phone sex but once you are comfortable with each about about it, you can try it out and see if you will like it as much. Be open to the fact that you may or may not like or your partner may or may not like it, at which point you would have to stop and try something else. Sex gets better when you talk about it open and honestly. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/top-10-tips-for-hot-phone-sex

  27. I always feel pain in the…
    I always feel pain in the vagina when having sex from the first time I had sex, please help.

    1. Hi Eve, painful sex is not…

      Hi Eve, painful sex is not normal. It is possible to experience pain the first time because of the stretching of the hymen and if you are not well prepared and relaxed during penetration. After the first time, pain can be caused by dry sex where penetration happens before the vagina lubricates, the sex position, the presence of a infection in the vagina or when one is anxious and not relaxed. Knowing what is causing the pain is the first step toward addressing. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/painful-sex-time-to-listen-up

  28. I have never enjoyed sex, I…
    I have never enjoyed sex, I always feel pain when I have sex, it is about how I had it the first tme? I have done with different people but I still feel pain? About orgasm can all women have it or it for just some few?

    1. Hi Maggie, so sorry about…

      Hi Maggie, so sorry about this. Sex should be pleasurable and not cause pain. Pain can be caused by a number of reasons including, dry sex where penetration happens before the vagina is sufficiently lubricated. Often, one may have to spend additional time in foreplay or use other artificial lubrication to supplement. Other causes include fear or anxiety that sex will be painful, which makes one not to relax during sex perhaps as a result of a previous experience that was painful, and also the position during sex. The first step is to determine what could be causing the pain to determine an appropriate solution. Most women can experience orgasm but sex should include one of the most sensitive parts, the clitoris. This will increase the chance of one getting an orgasm. It is important however to talk about sex with your partner and share what you enjoy and like as they also share what it is they like and enjoy. This will greatly improve the experience for you both. Have a look at the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/painful-sex-time-to-listen-up https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms

  29. We have been dating for 6…
    We have been dating for 6 months I want ask for sex how?

    1. Hi Joe, find a good time and…

      Hi Joe, find a good time and share your feelings with your partner. Let them know how you feel to see if they share the same feeling as you. You may find your partner feels the same, but you may also find they are not ready and in that case you will have to respect their choice. Remember to talk about and plan how to prevent unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-dos-and-donts

  30. How many times should you…
    How many times should you have sex with a man for him to be satisfied?

  31. I tried to break virginity…
    I tried to break virginity of my girlfriend but failed no blood I could not enter what happened?

    1. Dear Don,the hymen is very…

      Dear Don,the hymen is very elastic, so sometimes vaginal sex or even giving birth won’t make it tear. It also is a common misconception that a woman bleeds when the hymen is torn. This isn’t always the case. So if there isn’t any blood when a woman has sex for the first time, it’s doesn’t mean that she isn’t a virgin.
      Again, If a woman is nervous or scared, she unconsciously tenses her vagina. This makes the opening of the vagina feel tight and penetration can be difficult. 

      Check out this article: https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/female-virginity-top-five-facts

  32. Every time when we plan to…
    Every time when we plan to have sex, the only thing that will go in is the head from there it’s jus pain which makes me quit, please help I am 27 still virgin

    1. Hi Norah, so sorry about…

      Hi Norah, so sorry about this. Sex for the first time doesn’t have to be painful, though it might be because of the stretching of the hymen. In your case you also seem to anticipate pain based on previous experiences which means every time you try to have sex you are not relaxed which also means your vaginal muscles are not relaxed. This makes penetration difficult and painful. There are ways to try reduce the pain, including trying to relax during sex. Secondly, it is important for you and your partner to spend a good amount of time in foreplay which will get you aroused making your vagina moist and self lubricate, this will make penetration easier and reduce the discomfort. Lastly, communicate during sex let your partner know when you are ready for intercourse or when you experience discomfort. Check out the following articles for additional tips;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-top-five-facts

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/the-hymen-what-is-it

  33. My partner wants to have sex…
    My partner wants to have sex but I am not ready how do I tell him without hurting him?

    1. Hi Caro, all you need to do…

      Hi Caro, all you need to do is to be honest with him. Find a good time and let him know you are not ready to have sex just yet. There is nothing wrong with one person feeling ready to take things to the next level while the other feels it’s not time. The decision to have sex is entirely your own, only have sex if you feel it is the right time, you are with the right person and when you want to. If he does care about you he will respect your choice even if he doesn’t like it. When you do choose to have sex, remember to use protection to prevent both unplanned pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) using condoms. Check out the following article fork additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/how-soon-is-too-soon

  34. I have never had sex am 23…
    I have never had sex am 23 yrs do u think I am okay my friends even think am gay.

    1. Hey Collins, not having sex…

      Hey Collins, not having sex or abstaining from sex doesn’t make a person gay. It just means you have chosen not to have sex perhaps because you haven’t met the right person or you are not ready for the responsibility that comes with having sex. The decision to have sex is personal, take your time. You should only have sex when you are ready, you are with the right person and you feel it is the right time. Being gay means a person usually imagines themselves falling in love and having sex with someone of the same sex. Check out the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/sexual-diversity/sexual-orientation/lesbian-gay-and-bisexual

  35. Can a boy and girl who is…
    Can a boy and girl who is having sex for the first time can the but make the girl pregnant?

    1. Dear Edwinah, Yes, if a boy…

      Dear Edwinah, Yes, if a boy and a girl choose to have unprotected sex there is a chance that the girl can get pregnant. It is important for them to use protection, in this case condoms which can help prevent both unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections. Have a look at the following articles for additional information;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/female-condom

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom

  36. Me I had sex the first time…
    Me I had sex the first time it was too painful he stop the action. Am afraid to try again.

    1. Hey Jolly, so sorry about…

      Hey Jolly, so sorry about this. Sex for the first time doesn’t have to hurt. It is important to try and relax including spending time in foreplay to get you sexually aroused, which will help ensure it doesn’t hurt. When aroused the vagina becomes moist and lubricates making penetration easier and pleasurable. If you’re however, very tense, the vagina can stay dry or may tighten up making penetration difficult and painful. Take you time and communicate during sex which can also help you relax. Remember to use protection to prevent unplanned pregnancy and |Sexually Transmitted Infections. 

  37. I don’t think my boyfriend…
    I don’t think my boyfriend is usually satisfied during sex. What things can I do to make sure he is satisfied every time?

    1. Hey Priscah, is there a…

      Hey Priscah, is there a reason that makes you feel that he is not satisfied during sex? Sex becomes better when partners talk about it. Find a good time and talk about sex, let your partner know what you like and have him share with you what they like. This will greatly help in improving the improvement for your and your boyfriend. Have a look at the following article for tips on how talk about sex;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/talking-about-sex

  38. If your girlfriend feels…
    If your girlfriend feels pain the first time you have sex does it mean she is a virgin?

    1. Hey Ian, this is not true…

      Hey Ian, this is not true. Sex doesn’t have to be painful even the first time but it is it could be as a result of a number of reasons including the presence of a Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) in the vagina, having dry sex, the positions during sex, stress, fear, anxiety and in some cases the size of the penis. The first step toward addressing this pain is getting to know what is causing it. Check out the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/painful-sex-time-to-listen-up

  39. Is it usual for a a girl’s…
    Is it usual for a a girl’s vagina to have a bad smell?

  40. I fingered a girl can I get…
    I fingered a girl can I get sexual diseases?

  41. I love my man alot. He…
    I love my man alot. He claims he loves me too only that we have fights about spending time together and him giving me attention. Secondly what do you think about dating a man who is already married. Is this something yoh can encourage some who is already in it if they love each other?

    1. Hey Juddie, it is important…

      Hey Juddie, it is important you talk with your partner and get to know the source or what is causing the fights. Talk about the underlying issues that maybe causing the fights. All couples have disagreements, it is how they choose to address these differences that makes the difference. On the issue of dating a married man, it would appear the married is cheating on his wife in such a relationship. The more important question, if the married man is willing to cheat on their wife what would stop them from cheating again on this second person? Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/love-relationships/relationship-problems/fighting-dos-and-donts

  42. Which are my safe days to…
    Which are my safe days to have sex and not become pregnant?

    1. Hi there, safe days are one…

      Hi there, safe days are one of the most unreliable ways to prevent pregnancy, and we really don’t recommend it at all. When your safe days are really depends on the length of your cycle. Technically speaking, the first seven days before and after your period, as well as the time of your period, are relatively safe. But, if you have a shorter cycle (shorter than 28 days), or an irregular one, this will vary. Also keep in mind that sperm can survive for up to five days and longer inside the body – so even if you have sex on a ‘safe’ day, you can still get pregnant, because the sperm survived until your ovulation date. So you see, it’s a very inaccurate. And lastly, of course this won’t protect you from STDs. Only condoms will. So we really recommend a more reliable method. Check out the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/are-safe-days-safe

  43. I was not able to get an…
    I was not able to get an erection when I tried to have sex with my girlfriend why?

  44. When we had sex for the…
    When we had sex for the first my boyfriend ejaculated immediately before he put his penis inside. Why did that happen?

    1. Hi Dutchess, what your…

      Hi Dutchess, what your boyfriend experienced is known as Premature Ejaculation, which is caused by a number of reasons including fear, anxiety or stress. Anxiety that one will not perform can make them ejaculate much earlier or stress from home or work. In other cases, particularly in young men it could be the result of sexual inexperience, and so as the young man gets older he also gains more experience in controlling their ejaculation. There are a few things he can do to overcome this, see the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/how-to-overcome-premature-ejaculation Overcoming this will take practice and time, and for this reason your boyfriend will need your support and understanding.

  45. How can you know you safe…
    How can you know you safe days?

    1. Hey Molly, safe days are the…

      Hey Molly, safe days are the days that one can have sex without use of contraceptive and still not conceive.The unsafe days are the five days before ovulation (because that is how long some sperm cells can survive in the body) and the day of ovulation itself (because the egg cell is fertile only then). This means six days a month are unsafe, the other 24 are not. The only problem is that ovulation cannot be precisely predicted and they may vary for different reasons including stress or illness, also young girls and older women have irregular periods. So it is first necessary to know how many days-on average-your menstrual cycle is and how regular it is. If your cycle was always precisely 28 days, your first unsafe day is 11 and the last is 18.If  your shortest cycle was 21 days and your longest 33, your first unsafe day is 4 and your last unsafe day is 23. You now understand why this method is not very good if you have irregular periods. And also why it is possible to conceive in the first week, while one is still menstruating. The safest thing is always consider use of a contraceptive if you want to avoid unintended pregnancy. Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/safe-days-pros-and-cons

  46. My boyfriend want us to have…
    My boyfriend want us to have anal sex. I ha e heard that it is very painful if is true?

    1. Hey Daz, anal sex doesn’t…

      Hey Daz, anal sex doesn’t have to be painful, there are a few things you can do to make the experience enjoyable for you and your partner. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/guide-to-first-time-anal-sex 

      On the other hand, the decision to have or not to have anal sex is purely you own, only move forward with this if you feel ready. If you are not ready or do not wish to have anal sex, let you partner know. 

  47. How can you satisfy a girl…
    How can you satisfy a girl in bed?

  48. I have been very scared of…
    I have been very scared of having sex for the first time. Everyone I have spoken to said it was very painful for the the first time.

    1. Hey Winny, first time sex…

      Hey Winny, first time sex doesn’t have to be painful or uncomfortable. There are a few things you can do to make the experience more enjoyable starting with ensuring this is what you want and that you feel it is the right time. It is important that partners spend time in foreplay which makes the vagina moist or wet before penetration. This makes penetration easier and enjoyable for both. Also, it is important to relax during sex, anxiety or fear that it’s going to be painful is likely make it so. Remember to communicate with your partner during sex. Lastly, remember to use protection to prevent both unplanned pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Infections. Check out the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/how-to-make-first-time-sex-a-big-success

  49. Am a virgin and my boyfriend…
    Am a virgin and my boyfriend is demanding for sex i dont know what to do please i need you help

    1. Hey Chichi, the decision to…

      Hey Chichi, the decision to have sex is your personal decision. If you don’t feel ready to have sex, just let your boyfriend know and if he cares about you he will wait until you are ready. You should only have sex if you feel it is the right time, you feel you are with the right person and you are ready and mature to have sex. Have a look at the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-what-makes-it-good

  50. When should I have sex for…
    When should I have sex for the first time. I am now in high school and dating someone who is one year ahead of me?

    1. Hi Rehema, you only should…

      Hi Rehema, you only should have sex if you fell you are mature and ready for it. You need to think about whether it is the right time, whether you are with the right person and also remember that having sex comes with consequences including the risk of getting infected with a Sexually Transmitted Infection or getting pregnant. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/are-you-really-ready-to-have-sex

  51. Why fiance is looking…
    Why fiance is looking forward to me leeding the first time as a sign of being a virgin. If I don’t bleed it means I am not a virgin. How can I make sure I bleed?

    1. Hi Victoria, there is little…

      Hi Victoria, there is little you can do to make sure that you bleed. Remember, bleeding may happen when the hymen is stretched during first time sex. However, the hymen can be stretched through other activities such as some spots. It is important that you let your partner know that you may not  bleed the first time and this will not mean you are not a virgin. You could share the following article with your fiance;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/busting-the-hymen-myth 

  52. My penis is bent to the left…
    My penis is bent to the left s it normal to have a bent penis?

  53. Thanks alot, Hanna put it in…
    Thanks alot, Hanna put it in practice

    1. Thank you Maureen for your…

      Thank you Maureen for your contribution. 

  54. How can I ask her for sex we…
    How can I ask her for sex we have been dating for several months upto now?

    1. Hi Wasike, if you feel you…

      Hi Wasike, if you feel you are at a place where you want to have sex with your partner the right thing to do is to tell your partner how you feel to see if they also feel the same way. It is possible that you may feel ready to have sex but your partner may not feel ready and if this is the case you will have to respect their choice and wait until when they are ready. If you do choose to have sex, remember to consider using protection like condoms which can help to prevent unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections. Have a look at the following articles;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/love-relationships/meeting-someone/how-to-date

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-dos-and-donts

  55. What is the best still to…
    What is the best still to make a girl to come?

    1. Hi there, different people…

      Hi there, different people enjoy different things and this is why the best way to get to know this is to find out from your partner what it is they enjoy. Remember, the process is as important as the end, talk with your partner to get to know what they enjoy and also share what you enjoy. This will greatly help improve the experience for you both. Check out the following articles for additional tips;-

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/talking-about-sex

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms

  56. I had sex for the first time…
    I had sex for the first time and it was too painful I am afraid of trying again? What made this to happen?

    1. Hey Sarah, sorry about this…

      Hey Sarah, sorry about this. First time sex can be painful because of the stretching of the hymen during penetration or when one is stressed and not relaxed. It is important to ensure one is aroused, relaxed and that the vagina is moist which makes penetration easier and enjoyable for both partners. This also helps greatly to reduce the discomfort. Have a look at the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-top-five-facts

  57. My penis is curved the top…
    My penis is curved the top is facing upwards can it make a woman happy?

  58. Sex is always painful for me…
    Sex is always painful for me why?

    1. Hey Joyce, so sorry about…

      Hey Joyce, so sorry about this. Painful sex can be caused by a number of reasons including dry sex where you have sex before the vagina is well lubricated, the position during sex, penis size and also when sex is rough. It is important to communicate during sex especially when there is any discomfort. The first step to addressing the pain is to find out what could be causing the pain. Have a look at the following article for more information;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/painful-sex-time-to-listen-up

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/sex-hurts-help

  59. If a girl does not bleed the…
    If a girl does not bleed the first time how will you know she is a virgin? This is how we know in my culture?

    1. Hey RH, we appreciate your…

      Hey RH, we appreciate your cultural practices, however, it is possible for one not to bleed the first time sex they have sex. Bleeding is the result of the stretching of the hymen during intercourse, this can also be stretched during different activities like some sports other than sex. Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/the-hymen-what-is-it

  60. I had sex with my girlfriend…
    I had sex with my girlfriend, since then she has been bleeding…is it dat I did not do it well? She was a virgin b4 I entered her

    1. Hi Joseph, if your…

      Hi Joseph, if your girlfriend has been consistently bleeding from when you last had sex and this is not her normal period, it is important that she seeks medical attention as soon as possible since this is not normal. If she were to bleed the first time you had sex, it would not last for days days as you have described. Have a look at the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/female-virginity-top-five-facts 

  61. Thanks so much for this sex…
    Thanks so much for this sex Educate… I really appreciate that

    1. You are welcome Michael. 

      You are welcome Michael. 

  62. I fail to break virginity of…
    I fail to break virginity of my girlfriend last time. my penis was not strong what can I use to make it strong for next time?

  63. Tell me best sex position…
    Tell me best sex position for a girl to enjoy.

    1. Hi Kennedy, different people…

      Hi Kennedy, different people enjoy different things. It helps to talk to your partner to get to know what they enjoy, this way you will be certain about what is the best position for the person you are with. Additionally, have a look at this article for more tips;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms

  64. Can you get pregnant the…
    Can you get pregnant the first te yoh have sex?

  65. Can having sex with many men…
    Can having sex with many men affect your narriage un future help me coz hv slept with many

    1. Hi Jainz, some people prefer…

      Hi Jainz, some people prefer not to have sex before marriage for different reasons including religious beliefs while others have no issue having sex before marriage. Premarital sex may or may not affect your future relationship. The reality is that not all relationships will last forever and one may have to date a few people before they meet the person they end up getting married to. A relationship or marriage is what what the partners choose to make it and their past relationships do not have to affect their marriage.  

  66. I have had sex afew times…
    I have had sex afew times but he last time was different. My boyfriend used a condom but after we finished there was a whitish liquid like semen outside of the condom but the condom was ok. We were not sure if it was semen or I have infection please explain.

    1. Hi Nikie, it appears you…

      Hi Nikie, it appears you just had had an orgasm. When a woman has sex they can have an orgasm and when they have an orgasm they can produce either a whitish liquid like you saw. There is nothing wrong with this and it also doesn’t mean that there is an infection. Check out the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms

  67. Show me a video for the best…
    Show me a video for the best sthle for a girl to enjoy.

    1. Hi Ken, we do not have any…

      Hi Ken, we do not have any videos to share with you. However, talking about sex with your partner helps to make the experience better for both partner. This is because different people enjoy different things, for this reason, talk with your partner to get to know what they enjoy and what they want. Have a look at the following articles for more tips;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/talking-about-sex

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/our-favourite-sex-positions

  68. I lied to my boyfriend that…
    I lied to my boyfriend that I was a virgin now he want sex and I don’t know what to do?

    1. Hi there, your partner may…

      Hi there, your partner may never get to know whether or not you are a virgin when you have sex especially because not all girls will bleed the first time they have sex. However, building a relationship on lies can negatively affect your relationship. Remember, you will also have to keep this lie for as long as you are together. There can be negative consequences if you choose to tell the truth now, take time and think about the consequence of telling or not telling and then choose the one you are willing to live with. We wish you all the best. 

  69. I am addicted to pornography…
    I am addicted to pornography which makes me masturbate all the time. I want to stop but I have tried and failed please help me stop.

    1. Hi, if you want to stop…

      Hi, if you want to stop masturbating, you have to also address the porn addiction. You need to start by avoid porn, which might mean you cleaning up your environment, giving up your smart phone for sometime among other specific steps. Look around for any other trigger and avoid it or remove it from your environment. In some cases one may need to seek professional help in the form of counselling to address this behaviour. Lastly, fill up your leisure time with more productive activities. Beating any addiction can be tough, so take one day at a time. Some days maybe hard, you may find you keep going back but try not to give up, eventually you will beat this. Check out this articles for additional tips;- 

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/porn/porn-addiction-what-you-can-do-about-it

      https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/i-am-addicted-to-porn-and-masturbation

  70. These teachings are very…
    These teachings are very rare….thank you

    1. Hey Claire, now you have a…

      Hey Claire, now you have a place to get this information. You are welcome to Love Matters Africa. 

  71. thanks for your advice, i…
    thanks for your advice, i really learnt from it, all thanks to you, am not not scared of love again, can i chat you privately

    1. Hey Princess, you are very…

      Hey Princess, you are very welcome. We are glad you found this useful. Yes you can chat with use on either of our Facebook Pages, Love Matters Kenya or Love Matters Naija. 

  72. pls can a girl loose her…
    pls can a girl loose her virgin without sex

    1. Hey Folakemi, a girl can not…

      Hey Folakemi, a girl can not loose their virginity without having sex since it is after one has had vaginal sex that they are said to lost their virginity. On the other hand, the hymen which is what is stretched during sex, this can however be stretched by other activities like some sports. Have a look at the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/the-hymen-what-is-it

  73. Thanks for the article…. I…
    Thanks for the article…. I’ve learnt

    1. You are welcome Sonia.

      You are welcome Sonia.

  74. Wow I truly love this…
    Wow I truly love this Article❤️. I am 22yrs old and am still a virgin, I love my boyfriend so much, he travelled and left me a virgin. And he has being away for some years now. I haven’t seen anyone, i don’t want to mess myself up because I am disciplined when it comes to my body. I am still waiting for him. Am I doing the right thing? Because I have received a lot of discouragement from friends that I should have backup boyfriend (s), I shouldn’t tie myself to one man.

    1. Hello Royalty, thank you for…

      Hello Royalty, thank you for reaching out to us. So nice to hear that you and your boyfriend have been together for a while. We applaud you in your dedication to yyour boyfriend and to your relationship. If you feel that you are doing what is right for you, then do not let your friend’s opinions sway you. Remember that at the end of the day it is your body, and your relationship and what you decide to do is your decision.

  75. Hi admin;
    my girlfriend is…

    Hi admin;
    my girlfriend is still a virgin we have been dating for 2yrs now, we promise each other to keep intimacy aside until our wedding night, but recently she decided she was ready and she wants us to have sex but when ever we fix a date for it, getting to that day I usually get nervous and worried and I end up coming up with a lie to make us cancel Bcos of the size of my penis, it’s big, she hasn’t seen it before she has only felt it couple of time in my jeans, am worried it might hurt her or cause her a lot of pain Bcos it’s her first time, Pls I need your advice what should I do? She is beginning to feel that maybe I don’t love her that’s why am avoiding having sex with her. Pls advise me on what to do

  76. Hello Donald, thank you so…

    Hello Donald, thank you so much for reaching out and we are sorry you are going through a hard time. First and foremost, your girl friend is very lucky to have a gentleman like you. And it is completely normal to be nervous. The first and most important thing is to communicate with her so she understands that you are simply nervous and not in fact trying to avoid her. Communication is an important part of any relationship. Have an open and honest conversation with your partner.  Also, when it comes to the size of your penis and your fear of hurting her, this is also very understandable, like I said, communication is key, even when you both decide to make love. Take things slow with her, we encourage a lot of foreplay to arouse her as this will stimulate her vagina to become wet. Let her take the lead, ensure to use a condom and use a water based lubricant as an added measure to not hurt her. Water based lubricants are condom friendly and wont damage the latex. For more information, follow this link and good luck buddy! 🙂 Stay safe and have a wonderful week ahead.

    https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/virginity/first-time-sex-what-to-expect

  77. Hey Debbie, thank you so…

    Hey Debbie, thank you so much for your positive feedback! We will continue to do our best to keep you informed! Have a wonderful week ahead and stay safe!

  78. pls I need ur help,,,I have…
    pls I need ur help,,,I have dated this guy since we were in college,up till 5years now,it should be 6yrs but I minus1yr because we have misunderstanding for a complete 1yr,we are now together now,I now found out the issue was I never allowed him to enter me,,we due stay together,kiss,do foreplay,romance,but sex is what am not ready to do,,and he is my first love I don’t want to lose him…

  79. Hello Anonymous, thank you…

    Hello Anonymous, thank you for reaching out to us. We are sorry you are going through such a hard time.
    Communication is an important part of any relationship. Have an open and honest conversation with your partner. Explain how their actions are affecting you and the relationship. Try not to be confrontational because that would put them on the defensive and the resulting conversation would not be productive.  Be ready to listen to their fears and feelings and respond to them as well.

  80. Please my friend had a sex…
    Please my friend had a sex with her girlfriend without protection in a first time and he was seeking for help. what can he do to prevent pregnancy

    1. Hi Ezekiel, thank you for…

      Hi Ezekiel, thank you for reaching out to us. If they had sex without a condom and it was over 72 hours ago, there really is nothing they can do to prevent pregnancy. If it was less than 72 hours ago, the lady may still take an emergency contraception pill (P2).

  81. I
    Pls if I want to have sex…

    I
    Pls if I want to have sex with my partner first time is it necessary to use condom?
    If yes, can we enjoy it or not?

    1. Hi Agunbiade, thank you for…

      Hi Agunbiade, thank you for reaching out to us. This is really a personal decision. However, it would be best to do so because you are not yet sure about each other’s HIV status. Even if you have had test done, you could be inside the window period. Sex with a condom does indeed mean reduced sensitivity for the male but better safe than sorry.

  82. Ooh, I did bleed until I…
    Ooh, I did bleed until I said to myself “if that is what people call enjoying I will never do it the 2nd time, I will stay single without sex” but after all am now OK, I wish I had seen such tips before I started, I could be happy and enjoyed

    1. Hi, we are so sad to hear…

      Hi, we are so sad to hear that you went through such a rough time. However, we are glad that this post has been useful to you. Please feel free to browse through our website to find other articles that are of help.

      1. Thank you so much, your…
        Thank you so much, your posts are of more importance to many peeps

        1. Thank you so much for your…

          Thank you so much for your feedback, we appreciate it. Please feel free to go through our website to find other articles that you may find useful.

  83. Iam feeling very nervous…
    Iam feeling very nervous about having sex for the first.As of now iam gonna have sex with avirgin and virgin too.so i have little knowledge about although i have read lots of articles about this?
    Now here comes aquestion,while u having sex and she bleeds do you leave her and end the game

  84. Hi Bruce, thank you for…

    Hi Bruce, thank you for reaching out with your honesty and asking a great question. As long as you both of legal age of 18, can take it slow, listen to each other and are wearing protection (a condom) and are not hurting one another while having sex, then there should be no reason for either one o you to end the game. Why do you ask?

  85. i feel like having sex and…
    i feel like having sex and am 17 is it okay bt am afraid of the pain only

  86. Hello Shaline, thank you for…

    Hello Shaline, thank you for reaching out to us and asking a smart question. Unfortunately, the legal age to have sex is 18 which means you would be breaking the law if you had sex at the age of 17. The best thing to do is wait until you are of legal age before you try alright? Have a wonderful week ahead and stay safe.

    1. Hi Cynthia, we are so glad…

      Hi Cynthia, we are so glad to hear this. Please feel free to look through the website to find other articles that you may find helpful.

  87. I like the way some pple try…
    I like the way some pple try to overcome some sexual myths and surely it’s a job of charity…..thanks alot for sharing your great thoughts “Love matters”

  88. We are glad that you are…

    We are glad that you are able to benefit from our content Fiso and are always here to help. Go through our website for more information regarding sex, love and relationships and reach out to us if you are even in need of assistance. Have a wonderful week ahead and stay safe. 

     

  89. We are glad you love it…

    We are glad you love it Chioma Please feel free to go through more of our content and let us know what you think and if you have any questions, do not hesitate to reach out! Have a wonderful week ahead and stay safe!

  90. i broke my virginity a year…
    i broke my virginity a year ago and for the three times i’ve had intercourse i’ve always bled is that normal or should i seek medical assistance

    1. Whereas bleeding the first…

      Whereas bleeding the first time is quite common and regular. However, if you are bleeding everytime you have sex then you may need to see a medical practitioner for proper medical advice. You can call Marie Stopes Kenya today for free on 0800 720005 or WhatsApp them on 0709819001 for comprehensive information.

  91. there is a girl i love she a…
    there is a girl i love she a virgin she want to have sex with her but i told her until how wedding night but she wont agree what can i do

    1. Hi Peter, thank you for…

      Hi Peter, thank you for reaching out to us. Try and have a conversation with her and explain how you feel and what you want. Try and be open and non-judgemental so that you have a productive conversation.

  92. When i had sex for the fisrt…
    When i had sex for the fisrt time i did not see any blood but when i had sex for the third time i was bleeding i thougth it was a cut but it was not it was the blood the i was suppose to see for the first time,nw i understand better after reading about it

  93. Hi Oluwatosin, 

    Good to…

    Hi Oluwatosin, 

    Good to know. It could be that the hymen had not been broken the first time. 

LOVE MATTERS

Blush-free facts and stories about love, sex, and relationships