Illustration of sexpert Chris Hart
E. del Rosso

Is my girl enjoying sex?

Hi Chris, I would like to know: what are the subtle signs of a woman who is enjoying sex and having fun in bed?

Noise or quiet, assertive or reserved?

Every woman is different! Some are noisy during sex, others are quiet. Some are energetic, others are calm and relaxed, or even still. Some prefer to always let you take the lead, while others are more assertive and like to tell you what they want. Some prefer lots of emotional intimacy and foreplay as part of making love. While others are more direct and prefer ‘quickies’ to long romantic evenings.

So there’s no easy answer to your question.

Automatic responses

Especially as most of a woman’s physical responses when making love are pretty much automatic and subconscious, and don’t depend on whether she’s enjoying herself.

So for example, her pupils will dilate, her heart rate and breathing will increase, her skin will be flushed – all completely automatically.

In fact, almost all women will also get wet when there’s a possibility of sex, even when that might be most unwelcome. And most won’t even know they’re wet. So you can’t rely on these physical changes to tell you whether she’s enjoying sex with you.


Instead, the best sign that a woman is enjoying herself with you is the way she approaches the whole subject.

And that starts with her being enthusiastic about sex, rather than just consenting to it!

So if you can see in her eyes that she is really looking forward to making love, and not just agreeing to it to keep you quiet, then you can be pretty sure she’s enjoying herself.

Watch to see whether she’s organising the evening so that there’ll be plenty of time for sex. Or trying to do the opposite. Is she obviously looking forward to bedtime, or trying to put it off as long as possible?

A woman who’s enjoying sex will be emotionally relaxed. She’ll be happy getting physically close to you, will touch you and encourage you to touch her, and will gradually start to talk about your intimate moments together.
You’ll notice that she starts to feel free to move and change position as you make love. She’ll be more and more emotionally close to you, and with your encouragement, she’ll start to discuss her sexual fantasies and so on, even the ones that are completely crazy. And will suggest that you try them out. And when she does? Go for it!

How do you show your partner you are enjoying sex? Leave a comment below or join the discussions on Facebook.


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Recent Comments (4)

  1. Which style can make a woman…
    Which style can make a woman really satisfied?

    1. Hi There, it is important to…

      Hi There, it is important to talk to your partner and get to know what they like and what they want during sex. This is because what one person may enjoy another may not enjoy. Find a good time and talk to your partner so you can get to know what they like. Your partner can tell you what they like, show you or even teach you what to do to get them to satisfied. Taking about sex makes the experience better for both partners. Check out this article;- 

  2. hahahaha wich xtyle ix bext…
    hahahaha wich xtyle ix bext for enjoyment?

    1. Hey Fred, different people…

      Hey Fred, different people enjoy different styles and positions. It helps to talk with your partner and get to know what they like and enjoy and also share with them what your like and enjoy. This will help make the experience better for you both. Check out the following article for more information;-

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