A woman enjoying cunnilingus.
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Cunnilingus: the ultimate do’s and don’ts

By David Joshua Jennings January 16, 01:04 pm
Want to give your lady a blissful orgasm? Go down on her, of course! For many girls, nothing beats oral sex. Become a cunnilingus expert – check out our do’s and don’ts.
Do...
…keep things clean

Women, if your partner is going down on you, be kind and make sure things are clean and tidy. Taking a shower or bath beforehand will make you both feel more comfortable.

…enjoy yourself

If you don’t like the idea of going down on her, let her know, and do something else. If either of you are bothered about it, then it’s going to be uncomfortable for both of you. Hey, nothing is compulsory in sex. But once you get started, enjoy yourself! Being enthusiastic will go a long way towards helping your lady feel more relaxed.

…know your way round her body

The main focus of your below-the-belt exploration will be the clitoris – undoubtedly the most sensitive part of her body. For newcomers, it’s not always easy to find – it’s tucked away at the top between the labia, the vaginal lips. These too are full of pleasurable nerve endings.

How to find the clitoris? Imagine a diamond: the clitoris is a little knob near the top of the diamond, covered by a hood of skin. Many women prefer this to be stimulated instead of the clit itself.

The clitoris on the outside is like the head of a penis. Most of the clitoris is actually hidden away deep inside! Like the head of a penis, the clitoris might be almost too sensitive to touch, especially at first. Start by exploring up and down the inner labia with your tongue, then approach the clit gently and slowly.

Another area to be aware of is the opening of urethra where urine comes out. It’s just above the vaginal opening. Some women prefer this area to be left alone, for others it feels lovely.

…warm her up first

Diving in immediately with your tongue is bad play. If your lady is nervous or stressed about cunnilingus, it will be difficult for her to enjoy the experience, much less reach orgasm.

Begin by stroking and kissing her body, starting with the breasts and nipples and working your way slowly, slowly down to her inner thighs. As you work your way south, warm up her vagina by teasing it with your fingers. When she’s visibly hot, move on to kisses around her labia, combined with gentle licks, letting her feel your breath. Her moans and her movement should be your cue to begin moving towards her clitoris.

…stimulate the clitoris

When she’s turned, on her clitoris should be swollen and super-sensitive. Circle it tenderly with your tongue, at first quite slowly, gradually building up pressure. Follow her responses carefully to be sure it’s not too sensitive.

Once things are really moving, try wrapping your lips around her clit, sucking on it while moving your tongue back and forth. Vary your strokes, kisses and licks as she gets more turned on.

She might also enjoy it if you put your tongue inside her vagina. If she pulls away, back off. If she pulls you in, that’s a good sign she wants more. She may writhe around a bit to help out, but when you get to the right spot she might lie still and leave you to it. This is how you know you’ve got her on the edge.

At this point, don’t change things up. Continue doing exactly what you were doing that brought her to that point, and try to resist doing something else until you bring her to climax. When in doubt, ask what she likes!

…experiment

Some women like light, quick flicks of the tongue, while others like slow long licks full of pressure. Some like their g-spot stimulated at the same time, others like their nipples played with. The point is to play around, experiment with different techniques, communicate, listen to bodily cues, and find what drives her wild.

…use your fingers too

 Bringing your fingers into the action may be just what is needed to send her over the edge. While your mouth is busy, try squeezing her ass, or, once she is wet, slowly insert one or two fingers into her vagina, either stimulating her g-spot or simply moving in and out.

…try different positions

She can lie on her back with you between her legs. But for added spice, try mixing things up. Try it with her sitting on the edge of the bed and you kneeling in front of her. Or lie back while she sits astride your face and writhes – very hot!  Or the ‘69’ position, where you give each other oral sex at the same time, either lying side-by-side, or with one partner on top. It will depend on your height difference how well you match up!

Don't...
…forget to practice safe sex

Cunnilingus carries the risk of transmitting infection, so if you want to play it safe, particularly if you’re performing cunnilingus on a new partner, it’s best to cover the vagina with a condom slit down the side to open it up. The ‘official’ thing to use is a square of latex called a dental dam.

…forget a woman may need a lot of stimulation

For many men, just a few minutes of oral sex will make them come. But women tend to need more time. If you’re going downstairs, know that you may be down there awhile, and have some patience.

…think all women are the same

Every woman is different, so something that drove your last girlfriend nuts may not necessarily please your current partner. Explore, communicate, and find out what she likes.

…forget her upper half

Fondling her breasts or holding her hand are nice ways to make her feel more aroused and less tense.

…change anything at the moment of climax

When she's about to orgasm, keep doing exactly whatever it is that you're doing. If you are at a slow tempo, keep it slow, if you’re going fast, keep it fast. Throwing a curve ball in there at the last moment may send her plummeting from her orgasmic heights. And once she orgasms, she’ll probably prefer you to stop, given that her clitoris is highly sensitive at that point.

…suck too hard or bite

It’s super-sensitive down there, so don’t be too ravenous. Tenderness is the key.

...forget that your beard can hurt

Beard-burn on her thighs is going to distract her from whatever pleasure you may be arousing. Be mindful of your sandpapery facial hair!

…get carried away if she’s liking it

If she’s moaning and enjoying herself, don’t begin weirdly hard fingering her or doing something completely different. If she likes exactly what you’re doing, keep doing it!

...copy porn

In loads of porn, the cunnilingus is terrible! A quick munch and a loud slurpy suck. Follow our tips, and you can do much better!

 

Girls - is it a deal-breaker if he won't go down on you? Guys - cunnilingus, do you love it, or would you rather give it a miss? Leave a comment here or on Facebook.

Did you learn something new?

Comments
Anonymous
Sat, 01/17/2015 - 10:23 am
What if she is a virgin...isn't it painful for the fingering?? and you said about the clitoris..I haven't clearly gotten where it is located....and by the way love your articles..keep up
Hi Patirck, the clitoris is the most important pleasure spot for a woman, check this section for a graphic of its location: http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/vulva Now, regarding pain- nothing should ever be painful, even if a girl is a virgin. Pain is a sign that she is either not aroused and wet enough, or that you are being not gentle enough. So if there is pain, stop, check why, and try again.
Anonymous
Sat, 01/17/2015 - 01:31 pm
is this thing addictive? My girl hates it when i don't go down on her.last time she squirt on my face and i loved it but sometime one is just tired and don't feel like it
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