A banana-superhero dressed in a condom
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The penis: 15 more odd facts

Love Matters prides itself in providing all the basic facts you need to know about the penis. Here, however, we provide some more of the less basic facts.

  1. A man who lost his genitals in a childhood accident explains why he can maintain a fulfilling sexual relationship with his girlfriend: ‘1) use your imagination, and 2) any loving couple can be intimate.’

2. The South Korean ‘penis restaurant’ Deulmusae is covered in phalluses – from the walls to the dishware. Its clientele is mostly senior citizens searching for regained vigour.

3. Bhutan rates as the most phallus-crazed country on earth. Images of penises are literally everywhere and are considered ‘mirrors of the mind’.

4. An American woman jogger uses her satellite-enabled Nike+ app to draw pictures of penises based on her running routes.

5. A team of scientists bioengineers penises in their lab. They’ve already attached their creations to rabbits that were then able to get erect, mate, ejaculate and produce offspring. The team hopes to transplant their first penis on a human subject within five years.

6. The SexFit app claims to check the fitness of your penis based on factors such as “’thrusts per minute’ and ‘duration’.

7. Chinese hospitals have apparently introduced hands-free automatic sperm extractors.    

8. A European water insect can achieve 99 decibels by rubbing its penis against its ribbed abdomen.

9. The Argentine Lake Duck can apparently use its penis’s brush-like tip to remove competitor sperm before depositing his own.

10. Echidna, a platypus-like creature, has four heads on its penis which each take turns thrusting – and when one of these heads ejaculates, the sperm apparently bundles together like an angry comet of bees.

11. A certain species of octopus packs sperm into a detachable tentacle that then swims off independently in search of a female to fertilise.

12.The photo customization app Rock that Cock allows you to sex up your boring old dick pic with wings or a sombrero.

13. In a small community in the Dominican Republic, 1 in 90 children are born looking like girls before growing a penis at puberty. They are known as guevedoces (‘penis at twelve’).

14. Certain tribes in Papua New Guinea are famous for warriors who wear penis sheathes. Unfortunately, the fashion for ‘koteka’ is going out of style and vendors are complaining they can no longer turn a profit.

15. A German man has expanded his penis with 10 pounds of implants. He claims it makes him feel better mentally. He also believes he is merely exercising his right: ‘If a woman gets breast enlargements, nobody says anything about it.’

Are you baffled yet? Leave your comments below or on Facebook. For penis-questions, our discussion board has all the answers you need.

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