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Sex after pregnancy: myths and facts

Sex will be exactly the same after giving birth. And, you don’t have to wait before having intercourse again. Doesn’t sound right, does it? Both are myths.

​​Learn other myths regarding sex after having a baby. We’ve gathered them all for you and backed them up with facts.

  1. You can only have sex six weeks after giving birth

    While it is generally true that doctors advise waiting for about six weeks before having sex after childbirth, this doesn’t apply to all women. Some women might be ready earlier (but be aware that sex too early could lead to infections), and others will take longer than six weeks. Either is okay – take as much time as you need and don’t rush things if you are not ready yet.

  2. Sex won’t hurt

    Many women will feel some pain and discomfort the first time (or the first few times) they have sex again.

    That’s because there might have been trauma around the vaginal area during childbirth and it needs some time getting used to sex again. On the other hand, there are women who experience no pain. So give it a try, and if there is too much pain, you might need to wait a bit longer or try ways that are not painful.

  3. Everything will be as it was before

    Sorry, that’s not true. You might need some lubricant at first if you don’t get wet enough, or you may feel some pain. Your sex drive could change as well. And the vagina will have changed a bit, so sex might feel different than it did before.

    All this is normal and nothing to be too concerned about. Talk to your partner, and work out ways that are okay for both of you.

    And keep doing Kegel exercises ­– that will help with some of the changes.

  4. Sex will never be as satisfying as it once was

    No, that’s a myth! Sex will be different, but that doesn’t mean it will be less satisfying. You have to work with your partner to make sure that you can cope with the changes, and find new ways to satisfy each other if the old ways don’t do it for you anymore.

  5. You won’t need to worry about birth control if you just had a baby

    Breastfeeding can indeed be a good contraceptive method but it doesn’t work for everyone, and it’s not reliable, particularly if you aren’t exclusively breastfeeding.
    So if you are not planning on having another baby anytime soon, sort out your birth control methods before starting to have sex again.

  6. Women are the only ones who need time

    False! Many men need time to start wanting to have sex again, as well. Some feel guilty for putting their partners through the pain of childbirth; others feel unsure of how to initiate things again without pressuring.

    If you have any doubts or fears, talk to your partner! 

  7. The penis could damage the cervix

    That’s a myth, thankfully! As long as you are ready and go slowly, and use extra lubrication if needed, there is no risk of the penis damaging the cervix (or other parts for that matter), while having sex.

  8. Breastfeeding doesn’t affect sex

    It might, actually. It could cause some hormonal changes that make sex different altogether, but it can also bring surprises – it’s not unusual to lose some milk during sex. If you are uncomfortable with that, you could leave your bra on.
    Or have a good laugh because sex is so much better if you can laugh together at the unexpected!

Do you have any questions about sex after pregnancy? Leave a comment below or get in touch with us on the discussion board

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Recent Comments (34)

  1. does the styles matters in
    does the styles matters in having sex?

    1. The only thing that matters
      The only thing that matters is that both you and your partner enjoy what the two of you are doing!

  2. How does laughing help here…
    How does laughing help here. I have not understood the connection please

    1. (No subject)
      Hi Mandela,

      What are you connecting the laughing to?

      I hope that aside from that the information is useful.

  3. Can a man hvsex for 3wk…
    Can a man hvsex for 3wk after giving brith

    1. (No subject)
      Hi Mirry,

      Men do not give birth so I believe you are asking if a woman can have sex with a man 3 weeks after giving birth…
      Doctors will recommends that a woman resumes sex after six weeks following a normal delivery but may differ from one person to another. Some may be ready to have sex earlier then 6 weeks other may need more time, more than the recommended six weeks. If you do not feel ready to have sex, best thing to do is not to have and also talk to your partner about this. Review the article above for additional information.

  4. Thank you for this…
    Thank you for this information.

    1. You are welcome Emmanuel.
      You are welcome Emmanuel.

  5. does normal delivery have…
    does normal delivery have anything to do with enlargement of the vagina….
    cause some men say their wives ain’t tight enough as they used to be.#they fail to cum

  6. Thankyou for the information…
    Thankyou for the information I’m educated now

  7. We are glad this is useful…
    We are glad this is useful to you Fayie.

  8. I need to share this with my…
    I need to share this with my partner, he seems to think we shouldn’t have sex until I have delivered. I am about 5 months pregnant. Thank you love matters.

  9. Three months after giving…
    Three months after giving birth my periods are not back should I be worried? I had a normal delivery.

    1. Hey Rita, when you…

      Hey Rita, when you exclusively breastfeed, meaning, you breastfeed at least every 4 hours during the day and every 6 hours at night, and feed your baby only breast milk your body naturally stops ovulating and menstruating and for this reason You can’t get pregnant if you don’t ovulate. It is important you begin to consider a birth control method especially when you begin to including complementary feeding for your baby. 

  10. I feel wet when having sex…
    I feel wet when having sex with my partner since I realized I was pregnant why is this….even before I cum.

    1. Dear Dorcas, vaginal wetness…

      Dear Dorcas, vaginal wetness is the result of arousal. When aroused, which happens before orgasm, the vagina will become wetter. During pregnancy, one may have an increase in sexual desire or libido which may make them to get very aroused much quicker. There is really nothing wrong with this, it is part of what is expected during pregnancy. In other cases or other times ones libido maybe low. Check out the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/sex-during-pregnancy-top-five-facts

  11. Is there a risk of getting…
    Is there a risk of getting pregnant if we start ha ING sex after those 6 weeks?

  12. is there any possibility for…
    is there any possibility for awomen who is breastfeeding to get pregnant .?

    1. Hi Jemo, yes there is a…

      Hi Jemo, yes there is a possibility. However, for a woman whose periods have not resumed and they are exclusively breast feeding their baby, they are likely not to get pregnant. It is important to discuss with ones Doctor on Birth Control options as early as possible since periods may resume anytime after six weeks which means she can get pregnant. It is important to start using a birth control method to avoid this risk all together. 

    1. Hey Rita, do you mean sex…

      Hey Rita, do you mean sex during pregnancy? Sex during pregnancy doesn’t affect the baby, the baby is well protected in the womb. It is important however when having sex to use positions that are comfortable and those that exert minimal pressure on the tummy even as the tummy grows. Partners can have sex all through the pregnancy period. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/sex-during-pregnancy-top-five-facts

  13. A woman who pasted through…
    A woman who pasted through operation takes how long to in sex

    1. Hi Cate, do you mean how…

      Hi Cate, do you mean how long it would take for a person who has delivered through operation to be ready to have sex again? If this is your question, one should wait for atleast 4 weeks or after the Doctor’s review  and if the doctor says it’s okay. It is important to talk to the doctor before having sex after a Cesarean section. 

  14. Can a woman breastfeeding…
    Can a woman breastfeeding for two years using no family planning get pregnant?

    1. Hey Joyce, yes she can get…

      Hey Joyce, yes she can get pregnant. Breastfeeding delays the return of periods, so it can work as a method of birth control. This will be effective or not depending on how often, and for how long, your baby is suckling at each feed. However, it will only work if: 

      • One exclusively breastfeeds their baby whenever they want, both night and day.
      • The baby is younger than six months old.
      • Periods haven’t started again.

      Exclusive breastfeeding usually means a minimum of six long breastfeeds every 24 hours. By sis months the baby will been introduced to other meals which means breastfeeding will no longer be exclusive at which point periods will also resume and one can therefore get pregnant. It is therefore important to discuss with your healthcare provider options of family planning.

  15. I had a normal birth but…
    I had a normal birth but after six weeks I still see some blood is this normal? And when can I start having sex?

    1. Hey Prisca, this is how your…

      Hey Prisca, this is how your body gets rid of the extra blood and tissue in the uterus that helped the baby grow. Bleeding is heaviest the first few days after the baby is born. But if heavy bleeding continues after that, you may need to consult your doctor. After about 10 days, you should see less blood. It is important that you see a doctor immediately if you experience heavy bleeding at any time. Usually one would need to wait for upto four to six weeks before they can resume having sex but if you are still bleeding you may have to give it a few more days. Also, one maybe physically ready but they may not be psychologically ready. There is no standard time as to when one has to go back to having sex, this depends on an individual. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/sex-after-pregnancy-top-five-facts

  16. Is it possible for a woman…
    Is it possible for a woman to get pregnant after giving birth by having sex after two weeks of delivery

  17. Hi Joy ephy, thank you for…

    Hi Joy ephy, thank you for getting in touch and asking a great question. Based on our research, you can get pregnant as little as 3 weeks after the birth of a baby, even if you’re breastfeeding and your periods haven’t started again. Unless you want to get pregnant again, it’s important to use some kind of contraception every time you have sex after giving birth, including the first time.

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