Safe vs. unsafe sex
If you go beyond kissing and caressing, it’s important to know how to have safe sex and talk about it with your partner.
This is unsafe
- Intercourse (the penis inside the vagina) without a condom or another form of contraception such as the pill.
- Penetrative anal sex (the penis inside the anus) without a condom.
- Oral sex without a condom for a man or a dental dam (also called a vaginal dam – a square of latex to cover the vagina) for a woman.
- Using each other’s sex toys without washing them in-between.
This is safe
- Caressing, tongue kissing, cuddling, massaging, masturbating yourself or your partner.
- Intercourse (the penis inside the vagina) with a quality approved condom.
- Intercourse (the penis inside the vagina) with a quality approved condom to prevent infection and another form of contraception such as the pill to be sure of preventing unwanted pregnancy.
- Oral sex without getting sperm or blood (for example menstrual blood) in your mouth.
Two is better than one
The safest way to have sex is using both a condom and another form of contraception, such as the pill. The condom protects you against many sexually transmitted diseases. The other contraceptive, such as the pill, is to make sure you don’t get pregnant. Because a condom isn’t 100 per cent effective. For more information, see the section on birth control.
Never use two condoms at once though.
Tell us what you think
Recent Comments (237)
nothing
nothing
Is that a reply to ‘What
Is that a reply to ‘What happens when you are aroused?’
I do
I do
Hey, keep on staying safe.
Hey, keep on staying safe.
pls help how do i tell this
pls help how do i tell this girl that i have a crush onher
Hi Dee,
Hi Dee,
by being honest! That’s all that counts. Everyone has nerves and the girls know that. They will be flattered that you even tried to reach out and talk.
wht does arouse mean
wht does arouse mean
Hi Ramos,
Hi Ramos,
that really changes from man to man. The best way to find out is to ask your partner what he likes and enjoys. And watch his body language and expressions-silence isn’t good, goose bumps and moaning is. Talk, explore, learn!
Wil ladies ejaculate any
Wil ladies ejaculate any fluid when they have orgasm?
Hi J,
Hi J,
some do, others don’t.
Have a look at this article for more information on squirting: http://lovematters.co.ke/news/squirting-orgasms-what-comes-out
you are really amazing guys.u
you are really amazing guys.u teach us alot.
Thank you so much, Evans! We
Thank you so much, Evans! We are glad to hear that!
can premature ejaculation be
can premature ejaculation be treated and how?
Hi Korir,
Hi Korir,
It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression.
Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things!
Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up.
Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!).
Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other.
If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional.
You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish.
wonderful guys we learn a lot
wonderful guys we learn a lot we need more pliz
Thanks Victor.
Thanks Victor.
this is gud update
this is gud update
Thank you!
Thank you!
frankly a want knw when a
frankly a want knw when a woman gets fully eroused. and right time to start sex in case when she is virgin???
Luiz,
Luiz,
the right time would be when she is fully aroused and relaxed.
Have you had a look here? http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/her-orgasms
how can you seduce a girl coz
how can you seduce a girl coz i fear.
Hi JD,
Hi JD,
have you checked out our Making Love section yet? http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/making-love
whch pats r more sensitiv to
whch pats r more sensitiv to sexual arousement in ladies…..wch pats can i careress so that she falls into sexual moods?
Hi there,
Hi there,
have you checked out this article?
http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/her-orgasms
what if i begin sexual
what if i begin sexual intercourse with someone without arousing her will there be any effect?
Hi Mokobi,
Hi Mokobi,
yes! Yes will be in pain, and you, possibly, too, from the friction caused. This skin-on-skin friction can cause wounds and bleeding.
And, for her, it will just plainly be very uncomfortable.
By the way, sex is for both people’s enjoyment. So make sure she is aroused.
Is it possible for a man to
Is it possible for a man to know
whether his woman had n argasm during sex?…..And,
Is it a must a woman gets an orgasm everytym she’s having an intercourse?…..And,
If it’s a must and she doesn’t,is there any health problems?..Any help for her?
Thnx…
Wow, Lilly, so many questions
Wow, Lilly, so many questions.
Some men will realize when you fake an orgasm, others won’t. But: you shouldn’t be faking to start with! If you have problems, you need to find a way to have an orgasm. Many women won’t come from the in-and-out movement of intercourse, but they need to have their clitoris stimulated instead. And your partner might need to learn this. So help him, and figure out what you need to get satisfied.
No, it’s not a must to have an orgasm every time. Sometimes, it just won’t happen, whatever you try. Don’t worry, that’s totally normal.
Thankyou..We are learning
Thankyou..We are learning more n getting help from u guys…Keep up good work!
We will, Lilly, thank you for
We will, Lilly, thank you for your support!
i ussually get an orgasm when
i ussually get an orgasm when my legs are close together.
Thanks for sharing, Fridah.
Thanks for sharing, Fridah.
ma wife complain as i insist
ma wife complain as i insist to have sex almost daily. is it normal to have sex daily
There is nothing wrong with
There is nothing wrong with having sex every day. That said, it’s important to have sex when both partners want to have it. So you and your wife need to figure out what will work for the two of you.
What could be the problem if
What could be the problem if a lady does not come at all?
Is her clitoris being
Is her clitoris being stimulated? Many women cannot orgasm from the in and out movement of intercourse, they need their clitoris being stimulated.
Guy! i hav ever gotten some
Guy! i hav ever gotten some frank teachings like this i realy enjoy this conversation. keep it up guys.
Great, thanks!
Great, thanks!
have never had orgasm during
have never had orgasm during sex but it occurs wen mustabeting.plz wat can i do to av it during sex,help.thxs
Hi Jane,
Hi Jane,
Most women have trouble having an orgasm without the clitoris being stimulated- and most men don’t know this. This has nothing to do with size, as the in-and out movement of sex alone won’t get you enough clitoral stimulation. Check out this section to learn more about the clitoris, and have your man stimulate it during foreplay and intercourse: http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/vulva
hi,
hi,
when one uses a cd he takes long to release but when in intercourse without a cd it comes faster like even 2mins..what could be the case?
Hi Ken,
Hi Ken,
condoms can make it more difficult to feel your partner, which can lead to a longer time before you will ejaculate- while the heightened sensations without a condom will make you ejaculate faster. It’s totally normal.
When using a condom , you can spend more time on foreplay, so you are more aroused when you start intercourse, and the other way around if you don’t use a condom.
wau ths s realy teachful
wau ths s realy teachful
Glad to hear that!
Glad to hear that!
is there any affection if
is there any affection if someone last long wthout having sex?
No, generally, it won’t
No, generally, it won’t affect someone. You might get horny, men might have wet dreams, and you might be irritable for a bit, but it’s definitely not harmful.
how can you get rid off dark
how can you get rid off dark parts on the pussy.
Hi Eve,
Hi Eve,
it’s totally normal that your genitals are darker than your skin color. So don’t worry about it- you are beautiful the way you are!
Does murstabation av side
Does murstabation av side effects?
Other than pleasure,
Other than pleasure, relaxation and sexual satisfaction, no, there are no negative side effects.
comprehesive n clear!!!
comprehesive n clear!!!
Glad to hear that!
Glad to hear that!
I Love This Talk N Chat
I Love This Talk N Chat
That’s great!
That’s great!
can stimulation of the
can stimulation of the clitoris ave effects on the lady,eg affecting nerve sensation with time making her take more time to come?
Tracy,
Tracy,
not really. Stimulating the clitoris should make you orgasm faster, as it’s one of the most important pleasure points for a woman.
My wife always experience
My wife always experience pain during love making despite being married for over 6 years now. What could be the problem/
Steve,
Steve,
unfortunately, pain during sex is quiet common.
Have a look at this article: https://lovematters.co.ke/news/sex-hurts-help
Hi, what is oral sex?
Hi, what is oral sex?
Hi Tongaken,
Hi Tongaken,
it means stimulating your partners body and genitals using your mouth, lips and tongue.
i dnt enjoy sex with ma hubby
i dnt enjoy sex with ma hubby n can go even 5months without is it normal n funny enough i tried it with another man n enjoyed it.help me
Quinter,
Quinter,
why do you think you aren’t enjoying it? Are you not having orgasms? Is he not looking out for your pleasure? Does he not pay attention to your clitoris?
I don’t enjoy sex with my
I don’t enjoy sex with my hubby any more.he hasn’t changed any habit yet I enjoy my other man friend a lot
What could be my problem?
Do virgins wet thea pants
Do virgins wet thea pants when aroused?
Labo,
Labo,
if you mean wet their pants as in pee in them, no.
However, almost all women, when aroused will be ‘wet’ that means their vagina gets lubricated, which is important for painless intercourse.
hi,i really enjoy the
hi,i really enjoy the teachings here,but i have a problem coz as for now am nineteen years old but am worried about my penis size.are there natural ways to make it large?
Daniel,
Daniel,
there are no natural ways. The only way that works is surgery, and that’s for extreme cases.
But why are you worried about your penis size?
wow nyc one
wow nyc one
Thanks!
Thanks!
My gal is a virgin we tried
My gal is a virgin we tried to have sex once but I tell you penetrating her was like making a hole on a rock! I couldn’t penetrate through,i was forced to give up, n we decided to do it later. What should i do next time we meet?
charles,
charles,
make sure she is very relaxed, aroused and very wet. It would be great if you gave her an orgasm during foreplay already- this way she will be more relaxed.
And you need to be extremely gentle; you can start by inserting a finger or two, to start with.
Make sure she breaths out when you penetrate her- that will also make it easier.
Good luck!
Hi,tell me wht goex on to me
Hi,tell me wht goex on to me coz i’ve two gf joy and liz bt whn i xlep wtht joy i alwyx cam fxt bt wen xlep Wth liz it take lng term 2cam. plz wht makex me cam fxt to joy thn to liz?
Daice,
Daice,
do they know you are cheating on them?
It could be that one arouses you more, or does certain things that make you come faster, while the other doesn’t.
Just discovered the page, it
Just discovered the page, it’s very informative
That’s great Robert!
That’s great Robert!
Very nice and educative
Very nice and educative materials
Thank you!
Thank you!
you guys are great. kip up..
you guys are great. kip up..
Thank you, Austyn.
Thank you, Austyn.
Why do most fat women/Girls
Why do most fat women/Girls produce an awful smell
No idea! They do?
No idea! They do?
Is there any problems when
Is there any problems when someone mustabate daily?
There is no problem its
There is no problem its perfectly healthy Morayz.
is there any side effects wen
is there any side effects wen a lady drinks the semen released???
There is no side effects!
There is no side effects!
can u kno da pregnancy ov
can u kno da pregnancy ov five days using da urine test
Hi Liz, when using the urine
Hi Liz, when using the urine test one needs to have at least stayed 10 days from the day they last had unprotected sex.
Comprehensive
Comprehensive
Thanks 🙂 .
Thanks 🙂 .
Is it normal for a lady to
Is it normal for a lady to cum twice during intercourse? I mean to have orgasm twice
Yes that is very normal for
Yes that is very normal for ladies. They have the ability to have multiple orgasm during sex.
Is it good to sleep with
Is it good to sleep with women twice your age? For instance, a 20 years old with 40 years old women. Is it healthy?
Hi Mawich, there is nothing
Hi Mawich, there is nothing unhealthy about it as long as both partners are healthy and consenting to it. Age should not be a factor in a relationship as long as both are adults.
what a good lesson?
what a good lesson?
Thank you Havilla, we are
Thank you Havilla, we are glad you like it.
Wen a man impregnates a lady
Wen a man impregnates a lady during an intercourse does he feel
Hi Dota, there is no way of a
Hi Dota, there is no way of a man telling if they have impregnated a woman during sex. Even women can not tell. getting pregnant Is normally a matter of chance.
one can feel wen he
one can feel wen he impregnants a gal,there is tht moment u stay intimidate totally inconduct with ur partna en u fell strange…i felt it wen i impregnantd my gal
Yea dota,you feel it,even if
Yea dota,you feel it,even if you are used to each other,dat day moods will be high and you will enjoy than other dayz but atimes you don’t realize it
Wot can u do to ensure she is
Wot can u do to ensure she is fully satisfied?
Hi there, check out this
Hi there, check out this article to find out https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/ways-make-love .
Hi, My first round is very
Hi, My first round is very short, (1-3mins) yet it bores my galfriend, any remedy?
Hi Emmerson, check this
Hi Emmerson, check this article https://lovematters.co.ke/news/premature-ejaculation-top-five-facts .
Nice one.. Should women be
Nice one.. Should women be worried about dark labia? If the genitalia is darker than other parts?
Hi BB
Hi BB
Dark labia is not something they should be worried about.
Hi nice lecture, but my case
Hi nice lecture, but my case is different my hubby is a chronic pornographer and this has affected our love making he stay upto 3 month’s without sex becos he masturbate and am not the type that believes in infidelity and i believe he plays out too, what do you advice, and most times when he comes to me i feel pain because he comes at the wrong time
Hi Ogbest,
Hi Ogbest,
Thanks for writing to us. It sounds like your husband is addicted to pornography and that needs help to stop.
If you haven’t you need to start talking to him about it and encourage him to get help.
Addictions are difficult to get rid off and needs a lot of will from the person and support from friends and family.
Check out this article to learn more https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/how-talk-about-pornography-your-partner .
Also check out https://lovematters.co.ke/news/porn-top-five-facts .
Your hubby either thinks you
Your hubby either thinks you are a lousy lay or very naïve and conservative when it comes to sexual matters. Its either you become abit more liberal or he tones down. But one person has to relent since a compromise is clearly not happening.
My girl is the ‘get on get off type’ or maliza utoke’ if you will. That attitude sends me straight to porn hub to beat the hell out of that snake so that it gets the satisfaction it deserves.
Thanks for sharing your
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us and giving your input Puko.
Hi, how can I make myself
Hi, how can I make myself squat because my boyfriend can’t?
Hi Lexis,
Hi Lexis,
The only way your boyfriend can satisfy you is if you are able to satisfy yourself. You need to discover what you like and how you like it so that you can teach him. You can do this by masturbating.
Check out this article https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/masturbation .
i can really help u lexis,
i can really help u lexis.
Do you mind sharing with us?
Do you mind sharing with us?
l stay wit ma hubby for nw
l stay wit ma hubby for nw 2yrs bt he tries his best to arouse me bt I don’t feel him yet I love him so much.do I av a problem? if yes wat should I do to improve cause I don’t wanna lose him.
AHmBY
Hi Shilla,
Hi Shilla,
What is it that you like? What turns you on? If you have the answers to this you can teach him how to turn you on and improve your sex life.
Read more here https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/talking-about-sex .
awesome lessons, I like the
awesome lessons, I like the teachings but, am worried about what you say concerning mastabating ” if your used to it and get addicted, will it not interfere with your feelings towards your partner! please help!
Hi
Hi
When one is addicted to anything its never a good thing. But the truth is only a very small % of people become addicted to masturbation.
Masturbation does not interfere with ones sex life, instead it compliments it.
Read more here https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/masturbation-relationship .
Big up….
Big up….
Thanks.
Thanks.
When am having seen with my
When am having seen with my hubby I dry so fast and it cause me pain is there anything wrong with me??
Hi Suzie,
Hi Suzie,
There is nothing wrong. You should consider using a lubricant to avoid having painful sex.
hi
hi
i’m one ov da victim under PE circumstance buh i feel very bad when i spend lil time for da 1st round unlike having much time in da next rounds #plz help
Thanks for sharing that with
Thanks for sharing that with us.
So confused can aids be
So confused can aids be spread through sperms or any other fluids when there’s no blood contact ?
Yes it can. Sex is among the
Yes it can. Sex is among the highest risks of contracting the HIV virus.
Read more here https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/hiv .
yes,sperms are confirmed to
yes,sperms are confirmed to be having the highest concentration of the virus(high viral load),including the spinal fluid,thus AIDS can still be spread through sperms or any other fluids though there is no blood contact
Thanks for that Harbert.
Thanks for that Harbert.
i really enjoy the lesson
i really enjoy the lesson
glad that you do Lovis.
glad that you do Lovis.
true
true
We appreciate your feedback…
We appreciate your feedback Margy.
You have created awareness
You have created awareness
Hi Ngome, thanks so much for…
Hi Ngome, thanks so much for your positive feedback and we are glad! Have a wonderful week ahead and stay safe!
good
good
Thank you Musa for the…
Thank you Musa for the feedback.
Vry true
Vry true
Thank you Jane for the…
Thank you Jane for the feedback.
True
True
Thank you for your feedback…
Thank you for your feedback Suzzy.
Haveyuogataneysulary
Haveyuogataneysulary
True
True
i hve apaterner but he likes…
i hve apaterner but he likes qrueling al the time what should i do?
Hi Jonex, It is normal to…
Hi Jonex, It is normal to have disagreements in a relationship. It is however, important that you address the disagreements without having to hurt each other. Consistently fighting or disagreeing could be a sign of deep sited discontent in the relationship. You and your partner need to talk and find out where this is coming from and see whether what is leading to this can be addressed. Check out this article;- https://lovematters.co.ke/love-relationships/relationship-problems/fighting-dos-and-donts
Mombasa
Mombasa
What about Mombasa Hassan?
What about Mombasa Hassan?
Jutvread about the female…
Jutvread about the female Condon. Can it be used at the same time with a male condom?
Hi there, one condom male or…
Hi there, one condom male or female when used correctly and all the time will help protect against unplanned pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Infections. If it is really important that partners prevent pregnancy, then they can consider using at additional birth control method for added protection. This is because birth control methods do not individually provide 100 per cent prevention. Using 2 methods improves the prevention chances. Check out the following articles for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom
https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/female-condom
https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/choosing-the-right-birth-control/how-well-does-it-work
Where can I get female…
Where can I get female condoms?
Hey Shiqo, you could check…
Hey Shiqo, you could check you local pharmacy. You could also check the Health Centre, especially the public health centre where one can get them for free.
What might the chances of…
What might the chances of getting infected if the condom busted but we changed it immediately after we noticed?
Hey, there is a risk…
Hey, there is a risk depending on how long it took between when the the condom broke and when you noticed this and changed it. It is important to use condoms correctly, this ensures that it does not break during intercourse. This includes the use of one condom at a time. Have a look athe following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/using-condoms-dos-and-donts
I really don’t trust condom…
I really don’t trust condom. If I don’t know the status of the person I with I will not have sex with them. Condoms break and they are not foul proof. Better abstain if your not sure, that’s just me.
Hey Noel, we appreciate your…
Hey Noel, we appreciate your contribution. Between abstaining and condom use, abstaining is a better choice, indeed because of the human element in the use of a condom it can break or even slip off. However, condoms are effective when used correctly and consistently. One needs to use follow the steps that ensure correct use. Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/using-condoms-dos-and-donts
Is it satlfe to rub body…
Is it satlfe to rub body parts as in my partner on rubbed his penis outside my vagina he didn’t enter me. Is there any risk?
Hi There, there is a risk…
Hi There, there is a risk since even without entering, it is possible for your partner to come into contact with your bodily fluids and you can also get into contact with his fluids. For instance, before ejaculation men produce another fluid known as precum, which can also pass infections, same thing applies to fluids produced by the vagina as a result of arousal. If the penis will come into contact with the vagina, it is important that you use protection. Check out this article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe
Hi, is it advisable to put…
Hi, is it advisable to put on tow condoms at the same time like two male condoms if I am ha ING sex with a suspicious person?
Hi Lennox, one condom is…
Hi Lennox, one condom is sufficient for protection of both unplanned pregnancies and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). Using two condoms at the same time increase the chances of the condoms slipping off or bursting. All you need to do, is to use the condoms correctly and consistently and they will offer protection. Check out this article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/using-condoms-dos-and-donts
Does swallowing your…
Does swallowing your partners semen have any effect?
Hey Moureen, oral sex with a…
Hey Moureen, oral sex with a condom is unsafe which means one can get an infection from the semen if their partner has an infection. If they have no infection then swallowing the semen will not have any negative effect. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe
Where can I buy female…
Where can I buy female condoms?
Hi, you can try check the…
Hi, you can try check the pharmacy. Also, you may be able to find them also at a health centre near you.
My balls are itching is this…
My balls are itching is this a sign of an STI?
Hi Oscar, this may or may…
Hi Oscar, this may or may not be a sign of an STI. If it is accompanied with pain in the testicles, rash on the penis, testicles or groin, discharge (a milky white, yellow, thick or thin substance coming from the tip of the penis) or even painful urination then this maybe an STI. On the other hand the itchiness may just be the result of hygiene or the kind of undergarment one is wearing. Wearing underwear of cotton material helps to absorbs sweat reduces the discomfort, and also wear undergarment that is not too tight. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/stds-stis
What is the risk of using an…
What is the risk of using an expired male condom?
Hello Gowi, first off one…
Hello Gowi, first off one should not an expired condom or anything else that’s expired. The first risk is that it will not work – it is likely to break – exposing one to the risk of getting infected with a Sexually Transmitted Infections and unplanned pregnancies. Aside from this it may lead to irritation. Condoms should be used correctly and consistently, part of correct use is making sure it is not expired. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe
What does a painful pimple…
What does a painful pimple on my grin area mean it comes and goes. Is this a STI?
Hey Hezekiah, a pimple may…
Hey Hezekiah, a pimple may just be the result of hair growth. An StI will come with other signs such as painful urination, unusual discharge from the penis, swollen and painful testicles. If you have these signs, need to visit a medical centre for a check up. Check out this article for more information on STIs;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/stds-stis/sexually-transmitted-diseases-myths-busted
Can a man know whether his…
Can a man know whether his woman had an orgasm when having sex? Does a women have orgasm everytime she has sex? Mwisho if a woman doesn’t have orgasm everytime she has sex is this a medical condition to be treated? Thax.
Hey Lennox, you could ask…
Hey Lennox, you could ask your partner if she did have an orgasm, for some women because of the intensity of the orgasm they won’t be quiet. For some this may not be the case and this why it helps to talk about it especially if you are not sure. Communicating during sex is an important part of sex and it helps to make the experience better for both partners. It follows then that a woman just like men may not have an orgasm every time they have sex. This maybe caused by a number of reason including psychological issues or just not knowing what will get ones partner to orgasm. It helps to get to know what will get ones partner to orgasm to try and make this happens each time you have sex. Check out the following articles;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms
https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/talking-about-sex
Hi, My first round is very…
Hi, My first round is very short which is very frustrating what can I do?
Hi Kenny, it could be…
Hi Kenny, it could be because during the first round you get sexually excited too quickly. There are afew things you can do to try and better control your ejaculation, check out the following article for more tips;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/how-to-overcome-premature-ejaculation
Where to find the female…
Where to find the female condoms?
Hi, you could try cheating…
Hi, you could try cheating the pharmacy. Also, try checking the local government health facility.
My vagina is very itchy is…
My vagina is very itchy is this an STI I only have one partner.
Hi Sly, aside from itching,…
Hi Sly, aside from itching, are you experiencing pain when passing urine, has there been a drastic change in the smell, color or quantity of your vaginal discharge? If you are experiencing these symptoms it could be a sign of an infection, in which case you need to seek the services of health provider for further tests and treatment.
Where can I get special…
Where can I get special confidential treatment for an STI?
Hi Godfrey, you could visit…
Hi Godfrey, you could visit a government health facility where you will get STI treatment if you are indeed infected with an STI. Also, if you are in Kenya, have a look at the list in this article for options you can consider;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/get-help/clinics
I have missed my period does…
I have missed my period does this mean I have fallen pregnant?
Hi Jennie, aside from…
Hi Jennie, aside from pregnancy there are other reasons that can cause you to have a delayed period. These may include, hormonal issues, change in diet or environment, extreme exercise, weigh gain or weight loss and stress. You may want to get a pregnancy test to rule out pregnancy. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/unsure-about-being-pregnant/am-i-pregnant
Me and my boyfriend we have…
Me and my boyfriend we have used a condom 2 times and it burst both times why? I fear I am pregnant. What can I do?
Hi Nelly, many times when a…
Hi Nelly, many times when a condom breaks during sex it is because it was not used correctly or perhaps an expired condom was used. It is for this reason important that one uses the condom correctly and also consistently. To also prevent pregnancy better, one should also use another method with the condom. If it has not been 72 hours from the time you last had sex, you could consider talking Emergency Contraception which can help prevent pregnancy when taken within the first 72 hours after having unprotected sex. If it has been longer than 72 hours, you will need to wait for atleast 14 days and then get a pregnancy test to see if you are pregnant or not. Check out the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe
https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/emergency-contraception
sex
sex
Hey Morris, what about sex?
Hey Morris, what about sex?
What is the chance that I…
What is the chance that I can get a Sexually Transmitted Infection if the condom burst during sex but we changed after we noticed?
Hi Joy, if the condom broke,…
Hi Joy, if the condom broke, there is a chance that you were exposed. As to whether you were indeed infected, it’s important that you take a test to acertain this. But you did the right thing to get another condom once you realized that it had broken. Condoms will usually work well when used correctly and all the time. Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/using-condoms-dos-and-donts
Will flavored condoms have…
Will flavored condoms have any effect to my vagina? Second, I have seen some products that are meant to leave the vaginal smalling fresh are they safe to use inside vagina?
Hi Jayne, scented products…
Hi Jayne, scented products can upset the natural balance of your visa a leading to infections. You can, however, use scented condoms for oral sex. Secondly, just like the scented condoms, scented cleaning products will also upset the natural balance. The vaginal has a natural smell and It smells in the way it does because it is meant to do so. The vagina can also clean itself, hence no need of such products. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/female-body/8-tips-to-keep-your-vagina-happy-and-healthy
Tell me the truth are the…
Tell me the truth are the free government condoms poor quality bcz everytime I use they bust before i finish??
Hello Koima, government…
Hello Koima, government issued condoms are of good quality otherwise the government would not have issued them. Male condoms are made of latex, and this is regardless of whether they are government issued or the branded ones that are sold. When a condom breaks during sex, it has to do with the use. It is important to follow directions when using a condom to ensure it works when. These include checking the expiry date, putting the condom on and how to dispose it after use. Check out the following article for more tips on correct use of condoms;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom
Where can I get female…
Where can I get female condoms?
Hey, you could try checking…
Hey, you could try checking the pharmacy. Also, Government facilities do stock them.
Does being circumcised…
Does being circumcised reduce the chance of getting STIs like Syphilis and Herpes?
Hey Timothy, studies have…
Hey Timothy, studies have shown that circumcision can reduce the chance of one getting HIV by over 60%. There has been no studies whether this work for all other STIs. Check out the following for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/male-circumcision-and-its-side-effects
I have an STI that keeps…
I have an STI that keeps coming back, it comes with itching, bad smell and some pain in vagina when urinating. I have been antibiotic but it’s not working what can I do to treat it?
Hey Akila, it appears you…
Hey Akila, it appears you may have an infection. Have you been self medicating or you were tested and treated at health centre? It is important that during the period you are on treatment you do not have unprotected sex and that you also complete the prescribe the completed medication. Should there be a recurrence of the infection, it is important that you go back to your health provider for a review. I suggest you visit a health centre for a test and treatment.
I had a one night stand with…
I had a one night stand with a person that am not sure about her status. I remember getting a pack of condoms but I dont remember using any or finding the pack. I want to get tested for HIV and other STIs where can I get confidential testing? If it just happened afew days ago how soon can I get a test?
Hey, you can get tested from…
Hey, you can get tested from after 14 days especially for the HIV. Usually you can get such confidential tests from any government run facility. In the unlikely situation they cannot provide the test, they will be able refer you to a facility you can have this done. Also, if you are in Kenya you can have a look at the following clinics where you can get the services needed. https://lovemattersafrica.com/get-help/clinics
Can you be impregnated wen…
Can you be impregnated wen haved xx with periods day 1 ??
Hi Nancy, here is a small…
Hi Nancy, here is a small chance that you could get pregnant if you have unprotected sex during your periods. Check out the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/female-body/sex-during-your-period-top-five-facts
My penis is bent towards the…
My penis is bent towards the left i don’t know if that is normal?
Hey Mukisa, penises comes in…
Hey Mukisa, penises comes in different shapes and sizes and therefore there is nothing abnormal about a bent penis. It should only be a concern if it makes it difficult for you to have sex, you are unable to gain or maintain an erection or you have painful erections. Check out the following article for additional information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/male-body/help-my-penis-is-bent
Which parts are more…
Which parts are more sensitive to sexual arouse in ladies…
Hey, every person has…
Hey, every person has different hot spots. Stroking, kissing, nibbling or licking those hot spots feels amazing and is a real turn on. It helps to talk with your partner to get to know what they like and what really turns them on. Have a look at the following article for some ideas;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/foreplay-dos-and-donts
My wife thinks that I am…
My wife thinks that I am addicted to sex as I insist on having sex almost daily. Is it normal to want have sex daily?
Hi Turesh, it is normal for…
Hi Turesh, it is normal for couples to have different levels of sex drive, where one may have a higher sex drive than the other. It is important therefore for partners to talk about sex and find a middle ground that works for both. That you want to have sex daily with your partner doesn’t mean you are addicted, it may mean that you are strongly attracted to your wife;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/female-sexual-desire-ebbs-and-flows
There is a yellowish fluid…
There is a yellowish fluid coming from my dick. Is this an STI? I have not any sex for atleast 6 months…
Hi Henson, this could be a…
Hi Henson, this could be a Urinary Track Infection (UTI) or a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI). It is important you seek medical attention, where tests will be done and treatment recommended.
I had anal sex for the first…
I had anal sex for the first time now every time I go to the toilet I feel pain when going for long call. Is it an STI or something else happened to me? Please help I am very worried. Thanks.
Hi there, sorry about this…
Hi there, sorry about this. It is difficult to tell what could have happened, for this reason it is important to get medical attention for a check up by a health professional who will also advice if there is need for treatment. Check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/guide-to-first-time-anal-sex
If a condom breaks when you…
If a condom breaks when you are having sex but you change it when you realize it have burst can you still get infected if you changed it immediately?
Hi there, it is difficult to…
Hi there, it is difficult to tell if such short exposure can lead to infection. It is important to change a condom if it breaks immediately one realizes and also explore the option of getting Post Exposure Prophylaxis especially if the status of the other person is known to be HIV positive. Have a look at the following articles for additional information;-
https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom
https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/stds-stis/post-exposure-prophylaxis-misadventures
I used a condom alafu…
I used a condom alafu ikaburst mbona?
Hello Joel, many times when…
Hello Joel, many times when a condom breaks during sex, it has to do with how it was used. If one doesn’t put on the condom correctly or when one uses an expired condom. It is therefore important to ensure the condom one is i=using is not expired and that you follow the directions of use. Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/using-condoms-dos-and-donts
How can I make myself squirt…
How can I make myself squirt because my boyfriend has tried but can’t?
Hi there, not all girls…
Hi there, not all girls/women can squirt during sex. There are a few techniques that can help increase your chances of having this experience. It is important to talk about sex with your partner, this goes alongway toward making the sex experience better. Have a look at the following articles for tips;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/orgasms/her-orgasms
https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/kunyaza-african-secret-to-female-orgasm
Flavored condoms do thry…
Flavored condoms do thry have any effect on the vagina? What about lubricants like KY jelly?
Hi Emmah, flavored condoms…
Hi Emmah, flavored condoms should be used for oral sex so that the normal balance of the vagina is not disturbed including the smell which is an important pointer for telling whether one has an infection. Have a look at the following article for more information including which lubricants to use;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/our-bodies/female-body/8-more-things-women-should-not-put-in-their-vaginas
https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/lubricant-top-five-facts
What are the common signs of…
What are the common signs of STDs in men?
Hey there, the following are…
Hey there, the following are some of the common signs of STDs; umps, sores, or warts near the mouth, anus, penis, swelling or redness near the penis, skin rash, painful urination, aches, pains, fever, and chills, discharge from the penis among others. If you suspect you may have been infected with an STD, it is important that you seek treatment together with your partner as soon as possible.Have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe
I agree wit you Love Matters…
I agree wit you Love Matters. Good information.
We appreciate the feedback…
We appreciate the feedback Cristie.
Can I get STI if we only rub…
Can I get STI if we only rub as in he rubs his penis on my vagina but does not enter?
Hey Traicy, yes there is a…
Hey Traicy, yes there is a risk since their is likelihood of exchange of bodily fluids and this can expose one to a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI). Also, if your partner ejaculates anywhere near the vagina, it will not only exposed you to STIs but also the risk of unplanned pregnancy. Using condom each time however, will help keep you safe and prevent unplanned pregnancy.
I have used a condom twice…
I have used a condom twice but it burst both times I don’t know why. What can make a condom to break?
Hi Goddie, a few things can…
Hi Goddie, a few things can make a condom break during sex including using an expired condom, using the wrong kind lubricant and wrongly putting on the condom. It is important to follow the right steps when using a condom, from checking the expiry date to disposal of a used condom. Check out the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom
I miss my period and take…
I miss my period and take drugs the next month my period come out but since that time am having discharge and my fluid is not white but somehow missed with bloody pls help
Hi Ug, if you are seeing…
Hi Ug, if you are seeing blood in the your discharge do seek medical advice since we don’t know what drugs you took and for what reason.
What can you use if you are…
What can you use if you are allergic to condoms? I usually itch alot and get soars when I try to use a condom.
Hi Adebenichi, I believe you…
Hi Adebenichi, I believe you mean you have an allergy to the male condom or the material used to make the male condom which is latex. The option to use if you have an allergy is the female condom this is because it is made from a different material. Check out this article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/female-condom
Can you get pregnant if you…
Can you get pregnant if you only have anal sex?
Hey Shiko, one cannot get…
Hey Shiko, one cannot get pregnant from anal sex. There is a risk however, if semen slips from the anus into the vagina. For this reason, if one doesn’t what to get pregnant they should consider using a condom. Have a look at the following articles;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/female-condom
1993
1993
What about it?
What about it?
Honest and having one…
Honest and having one partner is safe
It is safe so far as you…
It is safe so far as you trust your partner.
Have learned something on…
Have learned something on safe sex
We are glad JAHKEY! We are…
We are glad JAHKEY! We are always here to help 🙂