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How it’s like being a bisexual in Kenya: my personal story

I am a bisexual. AND NO: It is not a phase; I am not confused, promiscuous, or unable to commit. Like many bisexuals, I have faced hate and discrimination in a society that preaches love and acceptance. This is my story.

Embracing my sexuality has been a significant personal challenge and long journey of self-acceptance and understanding. It has involved unlearning societal norms and embracing the full spectrum of my identity, regardless of the labels and expectations.

Balancing attraction to multiple genders is challenging, particularly when it comes to dating and relationships. Finding partners who understand and respect my bisexuality is always difficult.

Like many bisexuals I have experienced a fear of rejection when it comes to coming out to friends, family, and potential romantic partners. The fear of not being accepted or understood is daunting.

More often than not, I have encountered discrimination, both within and outside the LGBTQ+ community, from assumptions of being promiscuous, claims of being unable to commit to a partner, to questioning the validity of it all. Such attitudes have not only undermined my self-esteem but also hindered my ability to come out and live openly, frequently misunderstood or dismissed as a phase.

In past relationships, I have encountered invalidation of my bisexuality and relationships, particularly if they were with partners of a different gender. This invalidation is hurtful.

There is very limited or stereotyped representation of bisexuals in the media, literature, and culture. Lack of visibility and role models is contributing to feelings of isolation and alienation. I am in the photography and film business, the fluidity of bisexuality has helped me open doors to diverse relationships and connections. This feels like home to me.

I have had the opportunity to form meaningful connections with people of all genders and even convert them to clients. Win-win!

One of the most profound experiences has been the realization that love and attraction know no bounds. Being attracted to people of multiple genders has opened my eyes to the beauty and diversity of human connections. From the thrill of a first crush to the comfort of a long-term relationship, each experience has enriched my life in its own unique way.

My journey of being bisexual has been marked by both challenges and experiences that have shaped me as an individual and as a community. By acknowledging and embracing these experiences, I am able to promote understanding, raise awareness, and work towards a more inclusive and equitable society for all.

I dream of a world where diversity is celebrated and where everyone is free to love and express themselves regardless of who they are or whom they love.

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