Marriage proposals: do’s and don’ts
‘Will you marry me?’ could well be the most difficult question you’ll ask in your lifetime. So we advise you to prepare well! Before you go ahead and pop that question, here are a few dos and don’ts to keep in mind.
Find out if the answer will be ‘yes’
Put in some research. Bring up the topic of marriage and married life in casual conversations. How do they react? If they share your enthusiasm, then you can be confident that that they will answer ‘yes’ to your question. If they don’t seem too keen, then perhaps they aren’t yet ready to jump on the marriage wagon, so it’s better to hold off.
Make it memorable
Now, you don’t have to spend millions to have a perfect proposal. You just need to make sure that it’s a memorable moment in your lives. So pick a place that is special to both of you – perhaps where you had your first date or a spot that you both visit regularly and are in love with. And don’t forget to carry a gift along – doesn’t necessarily have to be a ring – but something meaningful.
You’ve got to be honest when you make the marriage proposal. Be earnest. Tell your partner why you want to marry them. Give them enough reason to trust you with your question. At the same time, don’t get carried away and make promises that you’re sure you won’t be able to keep.
Propose too early or too late
It’s a bad idea to ask your lover to marry you very early in your relationship. Get out of the honeymoon phase and when you’ve been in a steady relationship for a while, you can think of popping the question.
On the other hand, don’t wait too long! If you know that your partner is expecting a marriage proposal, act on it. Don’t make them wonder if they are wasting their time with you.
Make it public
We’ve seen in movies that proposals at sports games or movie theatres or city squares seem to work magically. But well, keep in mind that movies are scripted! In real life, not everyone likes to have publicity during such an intimate moment. So unless you have very good reason to believe that your lover will love it, don’t make a public proposal.
Related: Should women propose to men?
Panic if they say ‘no’
What if your partner replies with a ‘no’ to your charming proposal? Factor in this possibility because you can’t ever be 100 per cent sure of what’s on another person’s mind. If this does happen to you, don’t hit the panic button. Not everything is lost yet.
Find out why they think it’s not the right time or the right thing to do. Once you know, find enough time to evaluate their response and decide whether you want to give up pursuing them or give them more time to make up their mind.
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