Marriage proposals: do's and dont's
Rob Byron

Marriage proposals: do's and don’ts

By Friday, September 4, 2015 - 07:55
‘Will you marry me?’ could well be the most difficult question you’ll ask in your lifetime. So we advise you to prepare well! Before you go ahead and pop that question, here are a few dos and don’ts to keep in mind.
Do...
Find out if the answer will be 'yes'

Put in some research. Bring up the topic of marriage and married life in casual conversations. How do they react? If they share your enthusiasm, then you can be confident that that they will answer ‘yes’ to your question. If they don’t seem too keen, then perhaps they aren’t yet ready to jump on the marriage wagon, so it’s better to hold off.

Make it memorable

Now, you don’t have to spend millions to have a perfect proposal. You just need to make sure that it’s a memorable moment in your lives. So pick a place that is special to both of you – perhaps where you had your first date or a spot that you both visit regularly and are in love with. And don’t forget to carry a gift along – doesn’t necessarily have to be a ring – but something meaningful. 

Be sincere

You’ve got to be honest when you make the marriage proposal. Be earnest. Tell your partner why you want to marry them. Give them enough reason to trust you with your question. At the same time, don’t get carried away and make promises that you’re sure you won’t be able to keep. 

Don't...
Propose too early or too late

It’s a bad idea to ask your lover to marry you very early in your relationship. Get out of the honeymoon phase and when you’ve been in a steady relationship for a while, you can think of popping the question.

On the other hand, don’t wait too long! If you know that your partner is expecting a marriage proposal, act on it. Don’t make them wonder if they are wasting their time with you.

Make it public

We’ve seen in movies that proposals at sports games or movie theatres or city squares seem to work magically. But well, keep in mind that movies are scripted! In real life, not everyone likes to have publicity during such an intimate moment. So unless you have very good reason to believe that your lover will love it, don’t make a public proposal.

Panic if they say 'no' 

What if your partner replies with a ‘no’ to your charming proposal? Factor in this possibility because you can’t ever be 100 per cent sure of what’s on another person’s mind. If this does happen to you, don’t hit the panic button. Not everything is lost yet.

Find out why they think it’s not the right time or the right thing to do. Once you know, find enough time to evaluate their response and decide whether you want to give up pursuing them or give them more time to make up their mind.

 

Have you got something to add to the list? Leave your suggestion here or on Facebook.

Comments
I got a proposal at de frst date bt i cld nt hav t cz i was nt yet made ma myd bt after a few month he proposed again bt i was lyk yes i wl do n he was much happy, t was after 5months, was t early

Hey Oscar, you may get to know based on where you are in your relationship. If you've been together for awhile you will know for instance she maybe talking about the future with you, babies among other things. There is no way to however know for sure other than talking to her, asking questions getting know what her opinion is about marriage including if and when she would like to get married. We wish you all the best.

Hi Divon, you could begin by asking her exactly she feels toward you. Also, start by spending quality time together and then observe. Does she always want to spend lots of time with you, is saying good bye always difficult, does she share her deepest feelings with you, when she talk about the future does she include you in that future? These are some of the pointers to look out for. It is however still important to find out exactly how she feels. Have a look at the following article for more tips;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/love-relationships/how-do-i-know-if-she-loves-me

Hello Daisy, as you rightly put it infatuations usually fade away with time but when you really love a person the feelings will won't fade away. When you’re in love, you think about the person you’re in love with all day. You think everything they do is wonderful. Being in love can make you feel on top of the world, but it can also make you nervous and edgy. Check out the following;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/love-relationships/meeting-someone/is-it-love

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