Condom placed on red cloth
(C) Love Matters | Rita Lino

Safe sex is sexy

People sometimes complain that using condoms reduces their sexual sensation. Well, here are some tips to make things wetter, because wetter is better!
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If you’re planning to use lubricant, make sure it’s water-based. Oil-based lubricant can damage latex condoms, leaving you vulnerable to sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.

Flesh to flesh?

Before putting on your or his condom, put a bit of water-based lubricant inside it. The squishy lubricant will create a flesh-to-flesh sensation. Don’t use too much though, or the condom could slip off.

A tasty mouthful

Add flavour based lubricant on the outside of the condom to make oral sex tastier.

Why is wetter better?

Plenty of lubrication reduces the risks of small tears that can be the result of too much friction while having sex. These tiny tears around the vagina or the anus provide openings for all kinds of STDs. So, lubrication makes sex not just more fun, but also safer!

Riddle ID

Did you learn something new?

Comments

Hi Jeff, having sex without a condom can expose one to Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). If you feel you were expose to the risk of getting infected with an STI including HIV, wait for 14 days and then get test to see if you were infected or not. https://lovemattersafrica.com/safe-sex/sti-prevention/staying-safe

Hey Ian, do you mean how do you get your partner aroused and ready for sex? This is known as foreplay and it is an important part of great sex particularly for girls. Foreplay plays an important part in get your partner aroused and ready for sex. It includes activating such as hugging, kissing, caressing, undressing among other activities. Check out the following;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/ways-to-make-love/foreplay-turning-up-the-heat

Hey Caleb, a condom will break or burst during sex when it is not used correct. For instance if one uses an expired condom or uses more than one condom at the same time. It is important to follow the instruction for use to ensure a condom works well. When a condom breaks during sex, it should be replaced immediately if one wishes to continue with sex. Have a look at the following article for directions of use;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/types-of-birth-control/condom

Hey Tosh, indeed abstaining is the best way to prevent Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) and unplanned pregnancy. In the event, however, one is unable to abstain, they should consider using condoms every time they have sex to keep them safe and lower the risk of getting STIs.

I suspect my husband is cheating. I have no proof but now I want to start using condoms. I know he will not agree so I want to use the female condoms where do I get them?

Hey Lizz, there is no way to tell for sure if your partner is cheating but if you have any concerns consider talking about it with your husband. It is important that you try not to accuse him a cheater but rather raise your concerns with them to get to know what could be going on. You can check for the female condom at your local pharmacy and also at government health centre where you might get them for free. Lastly, to use the condom successfully, you will need to talk about this decision with your partner, when both of you are involved the chances of success are higher. Have a look at the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/birth-control/talking-about-condoms-dos-and-donts

Hi Alfred, a good place to start is to find out what is causing Premature Ejaculation. It is caused by a number of reasons including fear, anxiety or even stress. Anxiety that one will not perform can make him ejaculate much earlier or stress from home or even work. In other cases, particularly in young men it could be the result of sexual inexperience, and so as one gets older and gain more experience, they also become better at controlling their ejaculation. There are a few other things one can do to overcome this;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/how-to-overcome-premature-ejaculation

Hello Frank, thank you for reaching out to us. Erotica just like porn can be fun, inspiring, and a real turn-on. It should not have any effect on her ability to be aroused but can affect what she expects sexually and how she would like to experience eroticism.  

Hello Adebimpe, thank you for your question.  When your fertile days really depends on the length of your cycle. Technically speaking, the first seven days before and after your period, as well as the time of your period, are relatively infertile. But, if you have a shorter cycle (shorter than 28 days), or an irregular one, this will vary. Also keep in mind that sperm can survive for up to five days and longer inside the body- so even if you have sex on an infertile day, you can still get pregnant, because the sperm survived until your ovulation date. So you see, this method could be quite inaccurate.

Hi Bright, it is common for women to feel pain during sex and it is usually caused by a condition where the muscles of the pelvis floor contract making penetration quite painful. This condition is called vaginismus. The condition may occur from time to time, it may begin to occur later in life, it may occur in certain situations, or it may happen throughout one’s life.
The level of pain may also vary from mild to severe and from short term to long term. Vaginismus may be so severe that even wearing a tampon or going for a gynecological exam is too painful
Vaginismus could be triggered by many issues both psychological, emotional, and physical. These include fear or anxiety, trauma like rape or abuse, infections, menopause, inadequate foreplay, surgery to the area, or even as a side effect to medication.
Vaginismus is usually treated through a combination of physical and emotional exercises. If you feel that you may be going through this, have a conversation with your doctor.

Hello Bright, first, check the expiration date on the package, and then open it. The condom usually comes already lubricated. Get into a comfortable position like standing with one foot on a chair, lying down, or squatting.

Squeeze together the sides of the inner ring at the closed end of the condom and slide it in like a tampon. Push the inner ring into your vagina as far as it can go, up to your cervix. Please make sure the condom isn't twisted. Pull out your finger and let the outer ring hang about an inch outside the vagina. During sex hold, the condom open as the penis is going in to make sure it doesn’t slip to the side between the condom and your vagina.

The condoms also come with visual instructions to help you.

Hi Tonia The answer to all this, of course, is for a couple to talk about it. Because if you and your partner can understand how each other’s sex drive is varying, what’s a turn on and what isn’t, then things will definitely improve. Plus, your arousal isn’t only driven by your libido, but also by how close you and your partner feel towards one another. So if you aren’t feeling emotionally intimate, for example, because you’ve been having a fight, then you and your partner need to discuss how to get close again.

This article has more information that should be f help.

https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/libido-differences-matching-sex-drives

Love Matters
Sat, 11/14/2020 - 01:40 pm

Hi Lucy, we are so glad that we are able to help you make informed decisions with the information we have. Please feel free to go through the rest of our site for more information and do not hesitate to reach out to us in case you have questions regarding, love, sex, and relationships. Have a wonderful weekend and stay safe!

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