Erectile dysfunction: Top Five Facts
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Erectile dysfunction: top five facts

Erectile dysfunction – there are few things men are more reluctant to talk about than trouble getting an erection. It’s something that ‘happens to other people’. In reality it isn’t all that uncommon. So know your facts….

  1. What is erectile dysfunction?

    Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a sexual dysfunction that people also call ‘impotence’. It means that a man either can’t get an erection, or can’t keep his erection during sex

    ED can affect men of all ages, even though most men who have problems are older. In recent years, more and more young men have been developing issues in this department. Scientists are looking into the causes.

    But even though many people think so, ED isn’t a normal aspect of growing old. It’s true that older men need more stimulation to get aroused, but that doesn’t mean that they have sexual dysfunctions.

  2. What causes erectile dysfunction? 

    There are lots of things that can cause ED. It can be a side-effect of drugs and medications, or caused by neurological problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease or hormonal imbalances, such as not enough testosterone.

    But ED can also have psychological causes, even though that’s less common. If a man is really stressed or pressured, it can lead to ED. Relationship problems or feeling insecure about yourself can also cause ED.

    So it’s good to see a doctor when you are having problems in the erection department to figure out what causes the problem.

  3. How is erectile dysfunction treated?

    ED can often be a warning sign of a more serious health problem. So if a man has problems with ED, it’s important to see a doctor and find out what’s the problem. And taking care of the cause often helps with the ED.

    If it doesn’t, exercising can help overcome ED problems in many cases. Also, drugs like sildenafil citrate (sold as Viagra) might be a good option. Other drugs can be injected into the penis. There are also penis pumps and, as a last resort, surgery, that can take care of the problem.

    Sometimes, wearing a penis ring (cock ring) during sex can help a man keep his erection. Also, living healthily, quitting smoking and cutting down on alcohol can help.
    If the origins of ED are psychological, placebo drugs work really well. And psychotherapy is very effective.

    Related: All You Need To Know About Viagra

  4. What doesn’t help with erectile dysfunction?

    There are plenty of pills available over the counter and that can be ordered online that claim they can treat ED. But unless a pill has been prescribed by your doctor, you shouldn’t consider taking any of those drugs.

    Many are supplements and they don’t have to be approved before going on the market. So they could be dangerous to you and your health. Also, supplement manufacturers aren’t required to inform you about side-effects and potential risk of their products. According to the American Food and Drug Administration, there are currently no alternative treatments for ED on the market.

  5. Myths busted

    ED isn’t a sign that you aren’t attracted to your partner anymore. It also isn’t a side-effect of too much masturbation or watching porn excessively. Also, it’s a myth that ED medication will give you a constant erection for several hours not matter what you do. Ideally, you will only get an erection when you’re aroused. And having ED doesn’t put an end to having an exciting sex life – there are plenty of treatment options available!


    Have you had experience with erectile dysfunction. Share your thoughts below or join the discussion on Facebook.

Did you learn something new?

Tell us what you think

Recent Comments (118)

  1. Pls my penis shrink nowadays
    Pls my penis shrink nowadays,ply help

    1. Hi Richard, we need a little
      Hi Richard, we need a little more information on this. When does it shrink? How much? does it ‘un-shrink’?

  2. I’ve got a problem,i don’t
    I’ve got a problem,i don’t have any more feelings for my girl whom i’ve been dating for 8 months. When im with her,i don’t feel anything….is there any problem with me?

    1. Dear Richard,

      Dear Richard,
      Sometimes, unfortunately, people just fall out of love. There may not be any reason for this. It just happens. That doesn’t mean that there is a problem with you, or your girlfriend. Try to think if there is anything that is missing and see if you can change anything. If not- maybe it’s time to move on?

    2. Hi Richard, 

      No, there is…

      Hi Richard, 

      No, there is nothing wrong with you. It is totally normal not to have feelings for someone you’ve known for 8 months. We date people so that we can know whether we would like to be with them in the long term. The best thing is to be open and honest to her about how you feel. Do not be afraid to suggest a breakup since going on in this relationship is not good for you and her. 

    3. Hi Richard, 

      No, there is…

      Hi Richard, 

      No, there is nothing wrong with you. It is totally normal not to have feelings for someone you’ve known for 8 months. The best thing is to be open and honest to her about how you feel. Do not be afraid to suggest a breakup since going on in this relationship is not good for you and her. 

  3. I need your help I loose my
    I need your help I loose my erection very fast and also I ave premature ejaculation what is my problem

    1. It sounds like you are coming
      It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression.
      Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things!
      Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up.
      Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!).
      Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other.
      If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional.
      You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish.
      Also check out:
      http://lovematters.co.ke/news/his-and-her-arousal-how-get-sync

  4. I always have unprotected sex
    I always have unprotected sex with my girlfriend but cant make a baby,she doesnt menstruate i donw know why maybe thats the problem we cant make babies

    1. Hi Edward, the fact that she
      Hi Edward, the fact that she doesn’t menstruate could indeed be an indication for something being wrong. We suggest that the two of you see a doctor to discuss this issue. Some tests might be in order. Good luck!

  5. I experienced ED late last
    I experienced ED late last year but was hesitant to see a doc.When I did,tests revealed I was ok save for high cholesterol(9.3).Im presently on Atorvastatin which I will take for the next 6 wks.Will I ever be the bull I used to be?So scared.

    1. Hi Wycliffe,

      Hi Wycliffe,
      you need to stop stressing about it. Stress will only add to the issue. So take a breath and try to enjoy sex- after all, that’s all that matters!

      1. I always have a very good…
        I always have a very good first round but after that it’s very hard to erect again, what might be the problem and solution please. I need to satisfy and impress my partner

        1. Hi Anonymous, thank you for…

          Hi Anonymous, thank you for reaching out and we are sorry you are going through a hard time.  This is completely normal for men to have what is called a refractory period, where it cannot get hard after ejaculation. Honestly, your body is just telling you that it needs some time. There is no real way to change it or make it happen less, so just try to work with your body. If you are really hoping to have more sex, then take the time to recharge and focus on your partner. This is a good time to focus on them and give them pleasure. You will become hard again in no time and continue. We hope the information helps, have a wonderful weekend and stay safe!

    2. I would like to know where…
      I would like to know where you went for testing and what severa tests did they do?

      1. Hi Geo, 

        Visit the nearest…

        Hi Geo, 

        Visit the nearest hospital near you. If they cannot do the tests, they will refer you to a place where it can be conducted. 

  6. my problem is early
    my problem is early ejaculation how can I get help

    1. It sounds like you are coming
      It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression.
      Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things!
      Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up.
      Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!).
      Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other.
      If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional.
      You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish.
      Also check out:
      http://lovematters.co.ke/news/his-and-her-arousal-how-get-sync

  7. I really need to stop
    I really need to stop murstanating how can I do it ….???..Ae think I also have the ED problem but dont know y but am grateful for ur small education ..big up!!!

    1. Hi Wayne,

      Hi Wayne,
      first of all, let me tell you that masturbation is healthy and has no bad effects on your body or sex life. Whoever says anything else is not telling you the truth.
      Secondly, if you still think you need to stop, don’t try to stop from one day to the other. do it slowly. Reduce it by one or two times a week, and then slowly adjust to that.
      Thirdly, why do you think you have ED issues?

  8. Me i have been dating my g/f
    Me i have been dating my g/f for 8months n whenever we organise for a visit we can do all things bt wen i mention sex she changes her mood n tells me she is afraid of pregnancy . Wat shld i do n i feel much

    1. Hi Ben,

      Hi Ben,
      have you talked to her about contraception? There are many ways to avoid pregnancy, check out our birth control section for different methods. http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/birth-control
      Also, do you think she just may not be ready for sex? Talk openly about it. Ask her about her concerns, and be accepting of her opinions and feelings. Good luck!

  9. I have a problem on
    I have a problem on ejaculation, i do erect but it’s not strong & sometimes i cum vry fast even without enjoying & this has brought a lot of worries to me coz early i didnt use to be like this! help pliz

    1. It sounds like you are coming
      It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression. Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things! Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up. Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!). Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other. If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional. You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish. Also check out: http://lovematters.co.ke/news/his-and-her-arousal-how-get-sync

  10. I have been marsterbating for
    I have been marsterbating for years..I need help

    1. Hi John,

      Hi John,
      why do you need help? Masturbation is healthy and not at all harmful for your body.

  11. Av a prblem that av one
    Av a prblem that av one testicle of which makes me fear whether am fertile or not also kan it cause ED plz help coz iwant to av married

    1. Hi Jose,

      Hi Jose,
      we aren’t quite sure we understand your question? You have just one testicle, or there is a difference between your testicles?

  12. hi! Doc,I loss may erection
    hi! Doc,I loss may erection just seconds after the 1st ejaculation wich happens moments after starting the penetration, this makes me feel guilty that maybe I am not certifying my partner, help plz.

    1. It sounds like you are coming
      It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression. Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things! Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up. Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!). Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other. If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional. You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish. Also check out: http://lovematters.co.ke/news/his-and-her-arousal-how-get-sync
      As for satisfying your partner, have lots of foreplay, and with lots of attention, either with your hands or mouth, you can make sure your partner is satisfied before you even start having intercourse.

  13. Yes i understand that a man
    Yes i understand that a man has two testis Bt for me i av one does it affect my fertility and can it cause ED help

    1. Hi Jose,

      Hi Jose,
      having just one testicle doesn’t automatically mean a negative impact on your fertility. Arousal, erection and orgasm aren’t depending on the testicles, so if you have erection problems, they may not be linked to your testicles.

  14. My bf has a very big penis
    My bf has a very big penis and everytime we make lovi, I end up bleeding and in a lot of pain… I dont want to break up with him… help me please

    1. Dear Grace,

      Dear Grace,
      I am sorry to hear that you experiencing pain during sex. Sex is supposed to be a wonderful fun experience and be pleasing, not hurt. For women the pain can come down to two things, being relaxed and lubrication.

      Your body needs to receive someone else and stretch to fit them. You need to be in the mood, turned on and relaxed. Sometimes just taking more time kissing and foreplay will do a lot for your body. You need to be excited. Take time caressing each other, touching each other bodies and genitals, maybe even do oral sex on each other. Then you will be more likely to have pain free sex!

      We do not always have the time for to work ourselves up and have not self lubricated enough and then using lubrication can help a lot for sex.

  15. I need help pls my pennis is
    I need help pls my pennis is not as straight as i desire, it somehow bend to the right hand side. is there any help for me because that make me run from sex. fear that i will not act well.

    1. Hi Dan,

      Hi Dan,
      it’s completely normal that your penis is bend to one side. This is naturally and will not affect your sex life at all, so don’t worry!

  16. hi, please clarify these to
    hi, please clarify these to me before i post my question here, “are these questions visible/accessible to everyone under these page on facebook?”

    1. Hi Bonnie,

      Hi Bonnie,
      if you send us a PM, they are only accessible for the Love Matters Team. You can also send us a private email to [email protected]

  17. hi, please clarify these to
    hi, please clarify these to me before i post my question here, “are these questions visible/accessible to everyone under these page on facebook?”

  18. My prob is i feel my back
    My prob is i feel my back imean my spine burning(inflammation),wen istand ifeel lyk icarry aheavy thing at my waist,sleeping shud straight,sitting then ishud lean on wall otherwise if burning,what could be the prob with me and the solution of it…

    1. Hi there,

      Hi there,
      this could be a number of different things, from muscle tension to a hernia, and we advise you to go see a doctor about this. Good luck!

  19. Im in Nairobi,aged 25 n
    Im in Nairobi,aged 25 n having the same probl of ED,is there a doc around you trust who cn help me out!?

    1. Hi Ian,

      Hi Ian,
      check our ‘FInd a clinic’ tool for a clinic near you.

  20. For how long is a healthy
    For how long is a healthy man supposed to have sex with a girl? And how many ejaculations are supposed to be got??

    1. Hi Senator,

      Hi Senator,
      there is no exact time that is recommended. Sometimes you will ejaculate faster, sometimes it will take more time. It depends on many factors: are you using condoms, how aroused are you, are you sexually experiences, and so on. As for how many ejacualations: one for every time you have intercourse. And after you ejaculate, you will need to take some rest before you are able to get another erection. This is normal, and the older you get, the longer this period will be.

  21. I HAVE PROBLEM WTH MA WIFE
    I HAVE PROBLEM WTH MA WIFE SHE DOESNT DA ISSUE OF GOING THREE ROUNDS SHE COMPLAINS OF PAINS HW SHOULD I DO ?

    1. Hi Aleeck,

      Hi Aleeck,
      I don’t think the issue is your wife.
      Three rounds are a lot, and every vagina will be screaming with dryness and possible pain by then. Instead of rushing through three times, why don’t you take your time on the first one and really make it count? Spend lots of time on foreplay, make sure she has had an orgasm, before even entering her. And then make a game of it- try to delay your ejaculation for as long as possible. When it comes to sex, quality is more important than quantity, trust us.

  22. I HAVE PROBLEM WTH MA WIFE
    I HAVE PROBLEM WTH MA WIFE SHE DOESNT DA ISSUE OF GOING THREE ROUNDS SHE COMPLAINS OF PAINS HW SHOULD I DO ?

  23. WHAT SHOULD I DO MA WIFE
    WHAT SHOULD I DO MA WIFE DOESNT LIKE THREE ROUNDS SHE CLAIMS OF PAINS

  24. hi!doc my pennis is that of a
    hi!doc my pennis is that of a 5years old i.e to small and am so worry l nd ur help

    1. Hi Elijah,

      Hi Elijah,

      Why are you low esteem on your penis size? Are you worried you are not performing well in bed? Normally performance issues have more to do with confidence than penis size.

      Not to mention that size is relative. What is big for some is small for others and vise versa. Everyone’s bodies are different and it is more about how they come together, not stand alone. Sex is pleasurable when there is a chemistry between two people, when emotions are being shared and good communication. Tell your partner what feels good and what doesn’t. Experiment, you never know what will happen until you try and communication always leads to better sex.

      Check out these articles about penis size and love making:
      https://lovematters.co.ke/resource/penis-shapes-and-sizes

      http://lovematters.co.ke/news/big-penis-what-women-want

  25. hi!doc my pennis is that of a
    hi!doc my pennis is that of a 5years old i.e to small and am so worry l nd ur help

  26. Pls I need help, about ten to
    Pls I need help, about ten to fifteen years ago I used to take 3 girls a day without been tired but now only one and Im tired sometimes I cant go more than one round, meanwhile I use condom always

    1. Hi Joseph,

      Hi Joseph,
      well, the fact is, your are 10 to 15 years older now, and, unfortunately, as men get older, their sexual abilities also get a bit sleepy. This is nothing to worry about, it’s normal. It just means that you have to make that one round count. Spend lots of time on foreplay and enjoy every bit of it, instead of rushing to round 2. When it comes to sex, quality is better than quantity, really!

  27. I have a problem ma virgina
    I have a problem ma virgina is too smal ad ma guys dick is very big ad tall wher by wen he is puting his penis i feel pain though ma virg is very wet what can i do cz even sometimes i fear having sex wiz him

    1. Hi Miriam,

      Hi Miriam,
      try lots of extra lubrication, and, even more importantly, relax. Fearing the main will means you are tense, and that will make your vagina even smaller. Also, tell your guy to be very, very gentle and slow, giving you the time to adjust. You can even get on top and guide him, just as far as you feel comfortable. Good luck.

  28. hi?hw healthy is masturbation
    hi?hw healthy is masturbation?av seen uv sayed its health!

  29. I can only play sex one round
    I can only play sex one round,if i try second one,i find ma self unable wats the cause of that.

    1. Hi Allan,

      Hi Allan,
      This is completely normal for men to have what is called a refractory period, where it cannot get hard after ejaculation. Honestly, your body is just telling you that it needs some time. There is no real way to change it or make it happen less, so just try to work with your body. If you are really hoping to have more sex, then take the time to recharge and focus on your partner. This is a good time to focus on them and give them pleasure. You will become hard again in no time and continue.
      Hope this helps, let us know if any more questions arise.

  30. my problm is dat i errect so
    my problm is dat i errect so easily whenever am wid a girl.what is the problem?

    1. Hi Philan,

      Hi Philan,
      this is completely normal, especially when you are sexually inexperienced. Don’t worry about it. You could try to masturbate occasionally, to take some of your bent up sexual energy out.

  31. I found a new girlfriend whom
    I found a new girlfriend whom whenever i try having sex with her i dont erect normally and ejaculate even before penetration and before i met her i was ok what might be the problem

    1. Hi Ayub,

      Hi Ayub,
      what do you mean when you say ‘you don’t erect normally’?
      It might be that you are so excited that it happens. Don’t worry too much about it. Next time it happens, just take a break, and fully concentrate on her. Once you are able to get a new erection, try again. Good luck!

  32. my problem iz when having
    my problem iz when having with ma wife i usually remember my former g/f in order 2 reach tha goal.Now what should i do 2 end this?

    1. Ah, Mike, that’s a tough one.
      Ah, Mike, that’s a tough one. It’s quite normal to think of other people while having sex. But to always be thinking of your ex-girlfriend will be emotionally challenging. I suggest first of all, you stop beating yourself up about it. Secondly, make a plan to focus on your wife. Whisper her name, and try to keep talking to each other. See if that helps! Good luck!

  33. my problem iz when having sex
    my problem iz when having sex with ma wife i usually remember my former g/f in order 2 reach tha goal.Now what should i do 2 end this?

  34. Do musterbation have side
    Do musterbation have side effects ?

  35. Hi, doc. u said every time a
    Hi, doc. u said every time a man haves sex one should be able to ejaculate. my fist round is always fine, I ejaculate well. but the second round well never come no matter how much I try, I try different positions en lubrication though my penis is well erect but I cannot achieve ejaculation, I try until my girl can’t take anymore en I get tired en give up… plz help

    1. Hi Toni,

      Hi Toni,
      don’t worry too much, it just seems that your body needs longer to recover.
      All the more reason to make the first round count. Quality is much better than quantity when it comes to sex, anyway, so just enjoy the first round and don’t force yourself to a second round.

  36. my gal friend her vagina
    my gal friend her vagina is small but when i entered my penis to screwed first round, it turn very bigy.what is a problem.

  37. My penis is short and very
    My penis is short and very thin to satsify my partner. What should i do?

    1. What I am hearing from you is
      What I am hearing from you is that you are uneasy about your penis size and that you are worried that your partners aren’t enjoying physical pleasure and your looking for tricks to please your partner. First it is important to acknowledge that size is relative. Everyone body is different and both penises and vaginas range in sizes. What might be big for one woman is small for anther. So don’t worry to much about the size but they way you work with your partner. Communication leads to the best sex!

      Enjoyment comes from experimenting and communication. Try new things, tell your partner what feels nice and what doesn’t. Take time to pay attention to their body and find the special spots that they love. But most of all have fun.

      Here is some information on penis sizes and enlargement:

      https://lovematters.co.ke/news/small-penis-its-all-mind

      https://lovematters.co.ke/news/penis-enlargement-doesnt-work

      https://lovematters.co.ke/news/penis-top-five-facts

  38. Hi,doc i am a married woman
    Hi,doc i am a married woman for 10 year,i have a problem during sex,,my husband doesnt comeout after his ball loose it,,,wat can be the problem,wen i ask him he tell that he is tired,,

    1. Hi Lorrain,

      Hi Lorrain,
      sorry, we aren’t quite sure we understand what you mean- could you please explain again? Thank you!

  39. hi doc i broke up with a bf
    hi doc i broke up with a bf 2mnths ago i was rely enjoyng sex with him bt now av got anther bf i had sex with him bt nw the current dsnt satisfy me wat could be the prblm with me n he cams vry fast even before i do,plz hlp i dnt feel his dic

    1. Hi Pesh,

      Hi Pesh,
      sorry to hear you have some problems.
      First of all, keep in mind that it takes some time to get used to a new partner and you need to talk about what you like and how you like it. Sex is as much about communication as it is about the actual act. So tell him and show him what you like, don’t expect him to just know. As for the quick ejaculation, make a game of it- tell him right before he comes, he needs to stop all movement. Once the urge passes, slowly start moving again. Repeat this a few times, until you are ready too. Or tell him to pay lots of attention to your clitoris during foreplay, making you come before he even enters you. Using a thicker condom can also delay ejaculation. Good luck!

  40. Pliz Help, How Can I Prevent
    Pliz Help, How Can I Prevent Quick Ejaculation And Poor Erection(not Turning Raonds)?

    1. Hi Steve,

      Hi Steve,
      we are sorry, we don’t quite understand what you mean by poor erection, could you please explain again?
      As for the quick ejaculation, It sounds like you are coming earlier than you would like, this often happens to young men who don’t have a lot of sexual experience because they get very aroused very easily. With more sexually experienced men, it might be due to psychological problems, like fear, stress or depression.
      Generally though go slow, enjoy the buildup of touching and caressing each other. Make time for oral sex during your physical interactions. Take time focusing on your partner as well as yourself. Communicate together about what feels nice, what doesn’t and what you would like to try together. Experiment, explore and try new things!
      Make sure to use lots of lube and switch up the fun. Even if you do orgasm you can take some time to have oral sex with your partner until your body is ready to go again. Change positions and mix it up.
      Some people say condoms help them last longer, while others may use cock rings (just make sure it is the right size and not too tight!).
      Generally just remember that sex is more than just penetration and there are lots of ways to enjoy each other.
      If you are finding that you really cannot maintain an erection then it might be time to see a doctor. There are some medical conditions that can affect your performance but would need to be looked by a professional.
      You can also keep masturbating, however challenge yourself to last longer. Go slow, feel the way your body changes when you are getting closer to climax. Tease yourself, find tricks that help you delay the finish.
      Also check out:
      http://lovematters.co.ke/news/his-and-her-arousal-how-get-sync
      http://lovematters.co.ke/resource/making-love
      http://lovematters.co.ke/news/premature-ejaculation-couples-problem

  41. I have done stroking for
    I have done stroking for almost eight years while abstaining from sex, now I have dated my girlfriend whom I got recently, will I have sexual problem?

    1. Hi John,

      Hi John,
      I’m assuming my stroking you mean masturbation. Masturbating will not cause you to have any sexual problems. It might take a bit to get used to the different movements and sensations during sex- that you either mean that you will ejaculate quite quickly, or that it takes longer than you are used to.

  42. Nowdays my penis doesnt erect
    Nowdays my penis doesnt erect at all,no matter how long i foreplay.and if i erect,it doest last for more than 5minutes before it falls. Am afraid my girlfriend will cheat on me, plz help

    1. Morgan,

      Morgan,
      are you stressed or worried about something? Or are you sick or taking medication?
      Many things can cause issues with an erection, and it would be best to see a doctor about it.

  43. when you use Viagra ,does it
    when you use Viagra ,does it mean that your body will get used to it such that you will not be perfect again without Viagra?

  44. when you use Viagra ,does it
    when you use Viagra ,does it mean that your body will get used to it such that you will not be perfect again without Viagra?

    1. Bantu,

      Bantu,
      you should only use viagra if it was prescribed by a doctor for erectile dysfunction.
      If you have problems getting an erection, please see a doctor, because there could be underlying medical issues.

  45. hi…am having a problem of
    hi…am having a problem of E.D….. it occured wen i had a physical impact of erected penis with the ground…what can i do?

    1. Hi Dario,

      Hi Dario,

      If you ED is due to injury the best thing to do would be to visit a physician for medical assistance.

  46. hi doc i have ED and i thnk
    hi doc i have ED and i thnk its brought by my frequent masturebation please help me

  47. I am always very nervous…
    I am always very nervous when am about to have sex. It also takes me relatively too long to ejaculate and I can’t keep my ejaculation for long. What’s the problem?

    1. Hey Felix, feeling nervous…

      Hey Felix, feeling nervous or anxious before or during sex can caused you to take longer than intended to ejaculate. It if therefore important to try and relax before and during sex. If it takes you longer than 30 minutes to ejaculate each time you have sex it may important to consult your health provider. Have a look at the following article for more information;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/difficulties-with-sex-men

  48. Hi .. I am good in bed but…
    Hi .. I am good in bed but when I called my crush out, I was unable to get hard ..and after that night, I have tried getting hard even by watching porn and masturbating and even though I am able to, I am not usually hard enough well atleast hard like I used to be, it doesnt get hard enough and even after ejaculation, it shrinks immediately..What do you think my problem is? and do you think i need medical advice?

    1. Hi Ado, a  man will at some…

      Hi Ado, a  man will at some point fail to get an erection but when this happens all the time it may a sign of erectile dysfunction. An erection is during sex is usually the result arousal, and the intensity of the arousal can also affect the erection one gets. It is also normal to loose the erection after ejaculation. Soon enough one will be able to get another erection and they can then have sex again. Try and relax during sex, one of the causes can psychological which may include stress or even anxiety. Relaxing can help address these psychological issues. Additionally, have a look at the following article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/making-love/sex-problems-how-to-overcome-them/difficulties-with-sex-men

  49. Hi I have low sperm and low…
    Hi I have low sperm and low very low desire for sex could their be a problem

    1. Hi James, thank you for…

      Hi James, thank you for reaching out to us. A low sex drive/libido is rather common however men have been made to believe that their sex drive is directly linked to their masculinity.
      The causes of low libido include low testosterone, prescription medication, drug or alcohol use, too much or too little exercise, and psychological issues like stress or depression.
      Treatments include a better and healthier lifestyle, counselling services, changing medication that might have caused the issue, or where deemed possible testosterone replacement therapy.
      If the issue is causing you distress and is persistent, see a medical professional and get a comprehensive diagnosis.

  50. Hi
    I have ED problem and…

    Hi
    I have ED problem and when looking at the size of my testes I doubt, something that i suspect i have problem of sperm account.please help

    1. Hi Owino, 

      It would be best…

      Hi Owino, 

      Have you been diagnosed with ED by a doctor? It would be best to visit a doctor for tests and treatment. Your doctor should be able to establish the cause of the problem and recommend the best treatment option. Do not use any medicine without the recommendation of a doctor.

  51. I thought I experienced e.d…
    I thought I experienced e.d after a lady I was with seemed not to trust me

    1. Hi Eric, 

      Interesting. From…

      Hi Eric, 

      Interesting. From your statement, it seems that this was a temporary thing? To confirm your suspicion, ED can be brought about by stress, it could be that you were stressed out and this interrupted how your brain sends messages to the penis to allow extra blood flow. Also, in some cases, the more you have stress and anxiety about ED, the more you experience a cycle of ongoing ED. 

  52. Of late I’m experiencing Ed…
    Of late I’m experiencing Ed when I want to start intercourse, immediately I’m inside my dick shrinks completely en my penis completely don’t erect for some hours, this is a recent case, what can be the problem???? can sildanfil solve the problem forever??? cause I have used it for some time but can’t last beyond two days???need your help please coz I’m worried.

    1. Hi Ben, 

      It seems that you…

      Hi Ben, 

      It seems that you are experiencing erectile problems. Kindly visit a doctor for advice on the best treatment options. Sometimes the doctor will advise you to change your lifestyle such as lose some weight, stop smoking or drinking and in other cases, he/she may recommend medication or in other cases treat an underlying condition that is causing the ED. ED can be easily treated depending on the case but your doctor will recommend the best solution. 

       

  53. Is it true good to watch…
    Is it true good to watch porn inorder to make ur penis erect during sex?

    1. Hi Enock, 

      Yes, this can…

      Hi Enock, 

      Yes, this can work, however, if you get used to it, you may find it hard to get an erection without porn. As with everything else in life, moderation is very important. Do not become overdependent on porn. Also, it is good to ask yourself why you need porn to get an erection. Does foreplay with your partner get you excited to the point of getting an erection? If it does, I would suggest using foreplay to get an erection rather than depending on porn. 

  54. Like musterbation how can i…
    Like musterbation how can i avoid this I hope it may affect my relatiodh

    1. Hi Sam, 

      If you find…

      Hi Sam, 

      If you find yourself masturbating a lot, do other things that can distract you so that you are busy doing other things other than masturbating. Do more of what you enjoy during your free time so that your mind is focused on other things. If you cannot seem to stop, talk to a trusted friend, family, or sex therapist so that they can assist you. 

  55. I suffer from ED and also…
    I suffer from ED and also have premature ejaculation. Could it because I masturbated alot?

    1. Hi Laban, 

      No. Masturbation…

      Hi Laban, 

      No. Masturbation is not known to cause ED or premature ejaculation. 

  56. My problem is one minute man…
    My problem is one minute man,before we engage in the real act am already and mess up with my clothes, Another problem after the first round my penis refuse to erect an partner looks bored about it

    1. Hi Mickel, 

      You are not…

      Hi Mickel, 

      You are not alone, some men have reported the same problem. The best thing to do is to visit a hospital for tests and treatment. It may be that the treatment is as easy as a lifestyle change or a bit extensive such as treating an existing condition that may be causing the problem. Some cases of this problem are easier to treat than others but your doctor should advise on the best treatment option. If you want to understand what you are going through, read this article: 4 signs you have erectile problems and this one Top 5 facts about erectile dysfunction 

  57. I have aproblem ! I don’t…
    I have aproblem ! I don’t hold my erection and it’s giving me stress ! But I have been doing musterbation for long and I don’t know whether it is the One causing that problem ! And how can I stop this act help plz!

    1. Hi Frank, 

      Masturbation…

      Hi Frank, 

      Masturbation does not cause erectile dysfunction in men. It could be that there are other factors that are causing the problem. The best thing to do is to visit a doctor for tests and treatment. You may find that the treatment is as simple as a lifestyle change or a bit extensive e.g. treating an underlying condition. While masturbation is a normal part of sexuality, it may be a problem if it interferes with your everyday life such that you are not able to focus on certain aspects of your life. The best thing to do is to avoid things that can encourage you to masturbate such as pornography. Spend more time doing things that do not encourage you to masturbate such as spending time with friends, taking a walk, and exercising. If these do not work, it is important to seek help from a professional who deals with human sexuality or a counselor. Good luck with your journey! 

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