Beautiful young woman looking sad and staring at a computer screen
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Why can't I get a man?

By Rose Odengo January 21, 05:56 pm
Waking up feeling ugly, unwanted, and wondering: why am I alone? That’s Susan’s reality. Why can’t she find a man who wants her for who she is?

'Every time I watch these wedding shows on TV, I wonder what is wrong with me. I feel ugly. But with some of the brides, I feel like a mash-up of Beyoncé, Lupita, and Julie Gichuru – unstoppable beauty! Why is it that these brides get the guy? What am I doing wrong? I’m a size 12, hour-glass shaped, and well-endowed. I’m regularly told that I am ‘a sight for sore eyes’. So why do I feel so ugly?

'I know I am a good person. I work hard and am great at what I do. I am a great cook. I am respectful to people and don’t believe in being a b*!^h. So again, what am I doing wrong?

'I am almost 25-years-old. I don’t own a car. I rent my apartment like everyone else. I save and I am not in debt. So you can’t use the excuse that I am too much ‘Miss Independent’. I have all that I want. I am just doing the best that I can with what I have.

To every man I ever slept with, I was a ‘chips funga’ and it never went anywhere.

'I hang out, but in more age-appropriate restaurants and lounges. You won’t see me at loud and noisy clubs. I don’t know whether it is what I do, or what I don’t do. I just don’t seem to attract anyone worthy of a long-term relationship. By conventional standards, I should be someone men fight to love. I am ‘marriage material’. But still, I am the lonely woman going home by herself.

'To every man I ever slept with, I was a ‘chips funga’ and it never went anywhere. I have had that crappy line, "It’s me, not you" used on me. I even thought that changing my name from Susan might make me more appealing. I just don’t know. It bothers me every day that I wake up, go to work, and get home in the evening; and I am alone. What is wrong with me? Am I that hideous?

'Do I carry myself in a way that I come off desperate? Is that what adds to my unattractiveness? I just don’t understand.

'I hear the breakfast show phone-ins in the matatu in the morning, and I just nod my head in agreement while listening to women like me. I don’t know what kind of cure I need, if it actually exists. Whatever it is, I should use it to make me beautiful enough for a man to want me for me.'


What advice would you give to Susan? Is it a magic cure she needs or self-confidence? Leave a comment below or join the discussion on Facebook.

 

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Comments

Hey Jac, unfortunately we are not a dating service and for those reason we are not able to help you meet someone, we do wish you well though. Try and get into situations that that will give you the chance to meet new people. When you meet someone you like or are interested in, try and approach them to see if they would also be interested. All the best.

Dear Jac, unfortunately we are not a dating service and for this reason we are not able to help you meet anyone but we wish you well. Get into situation that will get you to meet new people and when you see someone you like be brave and approach them to see if they are interested. All the best, check out this article;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/love-relationships/meeting-someone/how-to-date

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