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Pornography: do’s and don’ts

Porn can make you sizzle with arousal, for your private pleasure or for sharing with a partner. How can you get the best out of it? And what are the pitfalls? Read on to find out.

  • …keep it legal

    As with all else, use your discretion. Do stay away from any websites that show children being sexually exploited. 

  • …watch porn with your partner

    More and more couples are increasingly watching pornography together, studies have shown. Watching a film together can add a bit of zing and variety to your sex life. Porn lets your imagination go wild and enhances your sexual chemistry. Try searching for ‘women-friendly porn’ for erotic films to please both of you.

  • …clear your browser history

    Stop your browser from storing your history, so no one can see what you’ve been looking at afterwards. You can do this by switching to InPrivate Browsing (Internet Explorer), Private Browsing (Firefox) or Incognito mode (Google Chrome). Alternatively, clear your browser history when you’ve finished.

    Private browsing won’t make you anonymous on the internet though. And remember any downloaded files will still be on your computer.

    If you do store files on your computer, hide them away in password-protected zip folders so that no one can accidentally stumble across your stash of pornography.

  • …confuse porn with real life

    Most porn is fantasy. Real people don’t look that way, act that way or orgasm that way. That can be an advantage of porn – it lets you explore fantasies you wouldn’t necessarily want to act out in real life. But there can be pitfalls.

    In pornography, the man endlessly hammers in and out of the woman while she moans ‘Oh yeah baby!’ The woman has huge breasts and loves it when the man comes in her face. The man has a huge penis and keep going for hours on end. He always pulls out to ejaculate. Real sex isn’t like that.

    Don’t let porn desensitise you so only the fantasy will turn you on. Watching porn can make it easier for men to see women the way they are often portrayed in porn – as sex objects, only there to please men.

    In real life, endless hammering isn’t the secret to giving your partner orgasms. Quality goes a long way and she’ll appreciate it more if you don’t act like a porn star!

    And just because the actors may seem to be enjoying it, it does not necessarily mean that they are. Remember that while some women enter the adult film business of their own free will, many are exploited. So don’t be carried away by the make-believe fantasy world of pornography.

  • …copy the aggression in porn

    Rough play is often shown in porn movies, but remember that those are professional actors who do this for a living. It’s far tougher for the camera to capture a gentle touch than an aggressive strong feel. Actions are therefore overstated.

    Don’t assume your partner wants you to grabbing her and be forceful, or smack her bottom. If she enjoys some rough play, she will let you know, so take it slow and easy and pay attention to the signals she’s sending out.

  • …just follow a routine

    Great sex happens when both partners are clued into each and in tune with the other’s wants and desires. This means feeling each other out and taking your time to discover each other. Don’t just launch into a routine you’ve seen in your favourite porn film. Instead, observe her reactions and find your own way forward. Everyone is different.

    If you and your partner enjoy watching porn together, don’t do it every time. It’s a shame if you can only get turned on together by watching porn. Variety is the spice of life!
     

    Do you think that porn can be ‘consumed’ responsibly? Leave a comment below or join the discussion on Facebook.

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Recent Comments (49)

  1. Hi…this is off topic, but I
    Hi…this is off topic, but I would like to ask for some help. My girl-friend & I are planning to introduce sex toys into our fore-play & I was hoping maybe you knew a place where we could buy some if it’s okay with you?

    1. Hi Kevin,

      Hi Kevin,
      of course, no problem.
      You can get sex toys online from doctorcrocodildo.com.
      If you are in Nairobi, you can also head to Diamond Plaze. There is a shop that sells all kinds of sex-related items there.
      Hope this helps!

    1. Hi there,

      Hi there,
      incredibly good or incredibly bad?
      We hope it’s the first 🙂

    1. Hi Julius,

      Hi Julius,
      thanks for your comment Do you like porn, the article, or both :-)?

    1. Thanks for your comment,
      Thanks for your comment, Jacob!

    1. Do you have any tips to add
      Do you have any tips to add that we don’t mention in the article?

  2. Is it right to masterbate
    Is it right to masterbate while watching porn

    1. If it’s okay with you, there
      If it’s okay with you, there is no reason why you shouldn’t!

  3. my partner and I would like
    my partner and I would like to have a look at some poem pics..how can we get them?this is to help us explore much during sex.

  4. my partner and I would like
    my partner and I would like to have a look at some porn pics..how can we get them?this is to help us explore much during sex.

    1. Queen,

      Queen,
      you can find lots of porn online.
      Just make sure that you start ‘easy’, and don’t end up on hard-core porn sites the first time you are exploring!

  5. There’s no need for it. If
    There’s no need for it. If there’s love in the relationship then the couple will make their love life interesting and pleasing to the other. This “porn” being acceptable and accessible put a false picture on marriage…Love is enough.

    1. Thanks for sharing your views
      Thanks for sharing your views with us Tohonestfory’all.

  6. What is the best way to stop
    What is the best way to stop murstabation?

    1. Hi Chema, The first thing is
      Hi Chema, The first thing is you can get ride of all pornographic material in your possession if you have any. You than need to systematically reduce the number of times you masturbate per day or per week until you can be able to stop completely.. This may take time so you need to be patient and resilient.

  7. I like wachng porn bt alone,n
    I like wachng porn bt alone,n evri tym i see it , i musterbate n i luv it

    1. Thanks for sharing that Eddy.
      Thanks for sharing that Eddy.

  8. Thanks a lot LMA for this
    Thanks a lot LMA for this advice.it has helped me a lot.. I really do appreciate the work you guys do.. Kudos!!

    1. You are most welcome Becky.
      You are most welcome Becky. Thanks for the feedback.

  9. porn is good for sex lessons
    porn is good for sex lessons and it arouses feelings. however, i have one problem, my wife doesn’t want anything to do with changing sex positions or styles yet i feel we should do so to enjoy. i have talked to her about it several times but all in vain. what should i do?

    1. Maganda, what are the reasons
      Maganda, what are the reasons she gave you for not wanting to change sex positions?

  10. what makes the men on porn
    what makes the men on porn seen to be hammering longer than normal?

    1. Elly, porn is not real that’s
      Elly, porn is not real that’s acting. So they are able to do what would seem unrealistic for most people.

  11. Does murstabation help
    Does murstabation help healthwise?

    1. no masturbation actually
      no masturbation actually causes stress this kind of stress later translates in depression which affects work school and general life

      1. Hi Ois, research on
        Hi Ois, research on masturbation shows otherwise. it shows that it can help relieve stress, lift your mood up and give you good health.

  12. i would like to join porn
    i would like to join porn acting, do u have any contact where i can start from

    1. Sorry Joel but we cannot help
      Sorry Joel but we cannot help you with that.

  13. may i ask if continous
    may i ask if continous watchng of porno can reduce my libido….as in causing pre mature ejaculation please

  14. Is there a porno group in
    Is there a porno group in whats app.

    1. Sorry uncle JJ but we can’t
      Sorry uncle JJ but we can’t help you with that.

  15. Which sex style is suitable 4
    Which sex style is suitable 4 gals generaly?

    1. Hi Jim, every girl is
      Hi Jim, every girl is different and therefore might prefer different styles. What works for one girl might not work for another. You need to talk to your partner and get to know which style they prefer or enjoy most.

  16. hi.we have been with my
    hi.we have been with my partner for more than 3 year,but when I asked her to make love,she always says that she is not in moods… what might have caused this?

    1. Maxel have you talked to her
      Maxel have you talked to her about why she is always not in the mood? This could be because she is not ready for sex or she might have other reasons. Talk to her about it find out what she thinks about sex and why she does not want to have it.

  17. can you advice me on how to
    can you advice me on how to make my dick grow please?u2szc

  18. How does porn restore broken
    How does porn restore broken love life?

    1. Collo it does not. Unless the
      Collo it does not. Unless the issue is sex and you are using porn to spice up your sex life. Broken love life is mostly mended through dialogue and understanding each other.

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