stressed woman in foreground and happy couple in background

Character development: here’s what you should know

If you have been in love in Kanairo, or in Kenya, you probably have a juicy story to tell about character development.

In fiction writing, character development is the process of building a unique, three-dimensional character with depth, personality, and clear motivations. Character development can also refer to the changes a character undergoes over the course of a story as a result of their actions and experiences.

But in Kenya, character development is getting heartbroken and taught a major life lesson in love and relationships: Nothing lasts forever. In other words, it is a heartbreak that leaves you questioning your idea of love and relationships.

You have probably seen the memes online. You are given character development until you become a prayerful partner.

The moment you are head over heels in love, until you can feel the butterflies in your stomach, is the moment they wake up one day and tell you, ‘Manze babe this is not working anymore. I need some space. Let’s just be friends. It’s not you, it’s me,’ or ‘you are too good for me’ – When you hear those words or a combination of such words, you receive your first-class honors in character development.

Strap your boots and head for the streets

In short, when someone says such things you are returned to the streets.

Once you are character developed, you become Taliban, and your heart likely turns into a stone. You think that everyone who wants a relationship with you is only out to hurt you and use you.

But the thing with hearts is that they heal and you will love again. How you get over a break up will determine how you proceed with your life and subsequent relationships. You have probably seen cases of people who end up killing their significant others after they were left.

That is not the proper and mature way to handle breakups, remember you cannot control what the other person is doing. You can only control yourself and your emotions. If it’s not working for them, you have to respect their decision and give them the space they want.

In a long-term relationship, your own identity becomes increasingly meshed up with your partner’s. But just because you didn’t work out as a couple doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you. It just means you weren’t a good fit—but someone else will be.

Character development teaches you:

1. You should never take someone for granted, you know how it feels.

2. How to respect others’ time and presence, because a relationship has to be mutual.

3. Honesty comes first, as many have lied to you.

4. Seize every opportunity you have, because life moves on. Fast.

5. How to respect effort because you have seen your tears not get appreciated

Now what?

Even though you feel devastated at first, if you give yourself some time to heal the wounds, talk it out to the right person, you will finally get over it. You will realize that the heart-breaking moment you’ve had was a teachable moment. And diamonds are made in the rough.

Be grateful for every heartbreak you’ve had, as it will make you a better person.

What has been your experience with character development? Talk to us in the comments section. 

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Recent Comments (18)

  1. Everything has it’s time if…
    Everything has it’s time if you are heart braked, just take your time before you move on and when you move on accept the other relationship was not yours

    1. I agree PPrincess! Thank you…

      I agree PPrincess! Thank you for your contribution!

    2. Great to this,,, thanks
      Great to this,,, thanks

  2. Currently battling such..ile…
    Currently battling such..ile character development nmepigwa aki??. Feeling so down, depressed,I can’t even define some of the feelings that I have.

    1. Hi Sonya, 

      So sorry to hear…

      Hi Sonya, 

      So sorry to hear that. You do not have to suffer in silence. If you’d like to talk to someone, call 1190 for free. You can also talk to us through our Facebook Inbox (Love Matters Kenya Facebook) or if you are comfortable, you can talk to us in the comments section. 

  3. Am facing such situation my…
    Am facing such situation my heart now its a stone to love

    1. Hi Vincu, 

      It is totally…

      Hi Vincu, 

      It is totally normal to feel sad and hateful towards someone or a situation after an incident. Yet, remember that you owe it to yourself to heal and forgive those who wronged you. It is the best thing to free yourself from the bad deeds of others. Never allow anyone to have so much power over you that they determine your perspective towards love and relationship – or everything else in life. Wishing you a joyful healing journey. 

      1. Most relationships end…
        Most relationships end because one partner is obsessed with having to derermine everything in a relationship

        1. That is partly true. If…

          That is partly true. If there’s no compromise and communication, there is bound to be conflicts. 

  4. Ile character development…
    Ile character development nilipeewa na some illiterate man taught me never to date a man below your standards especially academically. 80% healed through

    1. Pheeew! Liu pole sana. Si…

      Pheeew! Liu pole sana. Si utupigie hiyo story…

  5. Dio nimemaliza honeymoon…
    Dio nimemaliza honeymoon after graduation with first class honours…Kenya Institute of Character Development (KICD)…..namjue sina akili nimerudi tena….nayo nayo kupumzika ni kaburini

    1. Hahahahah…huh, all the…

      Hahahahah…huh, all the best!

  6. To forgive is divine but to…
    To forgive is divine but to forget is not easy. It’s real heart breaking, to come back be at the same level again it will take time, through stress, especially in a long relationship.

  7. We hi character development…
    We hi character development ni real. So Niko Kwa harakati ya kutafuta, Nikaendea dame fulani ndo nikuwe na option nyingine asside from my current girlfriend kuchagua Mwenye atasema yes I do. Next year. Aki hii vetting ni real Ile character development nimechapwa. Nimerudi Kwa my girlfriend. Wacha nikae Kwa option A and A alone..hizo butterflies ni real

    1. Client X usijali. Earth is…

      Client X usijali. Earth is hard! All the best with option A. 

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